When I was very young
I looked very petite
I had tiny little hands
I had tiny little feet

But as I got older
Now I’m in a rut
Everyone can see
My big fat butt

Perhaps it was the hotdogs
Or else the apple pie
Whatever it was
Figures never lie

It’s hard for me to see
Below my gut
But everyone else
Can see my big fat butt

I haven’t had a date
In over a year
So I sit in my house
Just drinking some beer

People think I’m crazy
Some call me a nut
But I’m so ashamed
Of my big fat butt.