bottles of pancake syrupby Joanna Zaczek

Today I went to Safeway and bought bottles of pancake syrup – blueberry and boysenberry. I was so excited to see them up on that top shelf – boysenberry especially. I mean, blueberry’s pretty common, but who really ever thinks of boysenberries on pancakes? I reached up like little kids do at kitchen counters and plucked those bottles off their shelf. They were heavy and made of a glass – like large old knickknacks you find in your mother’s curio cabinet except filled with dark thick goop that slid slowly from one end to the other when you held the bottles sideways. One bottle was red and the other was blue – opposites that looked so right together – as if you would just naturally see them side by side like boy and girl, bride and groom. They seemed almost rather perfect to me.

I sat them gently in my plastic Safeway basket. They clanged together when I walked and I was somewhat scared they’d break. I was so proud of myself to have found them. I looked at their Smucker’s labels and wondered how wonderful their syrup would taste on pancakes.

And then, I decided to visit the jellies. It had been my second plan of attack if there was no syrup – I had heard tell that jelly could do just as well on pancakes. To the opposite side of Safeway, I walked – to the wall that held the sandwich makings and there they sat. The jellies were sitting upon their shelves in neat little rows and there were blueberry and boysenberry preserves. In a way, they seemed almost perfect too – like they would be sitting side by side . . . but more like awkward acquaintances on a park bench, not sitting there for any real interaction or intimacy, but just sitting there.

I didn’t need them! I had my syrup. I had my actual genuine pancake syrup and I didn’t need any sandwich destined substitute. I had the real thing for $3.29 a bottle. In the seven year old part of my mind, the syrups were chuckling to themselves in my basket. Screw you, jelly! I have pancake syrup!

With my basket, weighed down with heavy bottles of mixtures made up of high fructose corn syrup, corn syrup, blueberries, boysenberries, water, pectin, citric acid, xanthan gum, natural flavor and boysenberry and blueberry concentrates, I walked to the front and paid for my pancake syrup. I walked home with it in a white plastic Safeway bag and listened contently to the orchestral score of a movie meant for those much younger than myself.

I thought about pancakes – I thought about one stacked on top of another in a little tower, slightly leaning to one side. I thought about blueberry and boysenberry syrup running down the sides and little candies and sprinkles floating in the flows. I thought of a little bubblegum pink lollipop sticking out from the top and how a year ago, this candied breakfast was served at IHOP for a limited time – they were called ‘Who-cakes’. I thought of Easter Sunday and my mom sitting at home as I walked across the street from Safeway. On Sunday morning, I was going to make her breakfast – a stack of ‘Who-cakes’ of my very own with blueberry and boysenberry syrup that I had bought myself from Safeway.