“Welcome Pete and Doreen come on in.” said Bill.

“I won’t take my coat off Bill, I have a bit of a chill.”

“Oh that won’t do Pete, you had better have a stout.”

 ”Hello Mavis we are here!” Doreen called out.

***************

The two men got their drinks and sat on the garden bench.

Their wives bought out sandwiches and cheese that was French.

When Pete dropped his down his front Doreen said ”You Fool.

It was a lovely day, with sun shining, but the breeze was cool.

***************

“There are some funny neighbours around here.” Said Mavis

” I will start with the family Number one, Mr and Mrs Davis,

She’s a funny little thing, He is a giant of a man I found out,

he has shirked a lot of time off work and likes lazing about.”

***************

 Doreen, Bill and Pete stopped talking and listened too,

as Mavis started to tell about the people from number Two.

“Anyway those from number two are neighbourhood watch,

we call them the ‘Goodies’  but they are such a weird match.”

***************

Mavis goes on with the others ears burning they are on fire,

when she tells of the next one who holds a self desire.

“They get on with number three, our neighbours direct

where the man sits on his door step in his swim briefs erect.”

***************

Doreen butts in with interest of this man in mind,

“Its amazing at a new place, the sights you may find,

so what about the man I can see at number four

I feel that I have seen him somewhere else before.”

***************

Bill said “I was talking to him, Mr Toad only this morning,

when he parked his tractor outside Goodie’s without warning,

Aye, Mr Goodie asked him to move, he was making a fuss

but Mr Toad told me that tomorrow he will bring his bus.” 

***************

“That will be interesting, maybe a duel at sundown,”

Pete reflected the gunfight at an old western town.

Doreen interrupted “OK It’s you now at Number Five,

this is a funny estate but I think you will survive.”

***************

Mavis replied reflecting on moving into the estate,

“We kept us to ourselves if that isn’t tempting fate.

like number six who moved in recently only to rent,

you never know with them to whether they are bent.”

***************

“So how many more do you know say your Number Seven?”

“We often hear weird noises at night at half past eleven,

Miss Blobby next door, she has a dog, a bitch called Damian,’

She plays with her in the bedroom I am sure she’s a lesbian.”

***************

“That’s weird, maybe she’s a witch and believes in the occult.”

“Every time we have tried to be civil she replies with an insult”

“She has a weird way of making friends, you better watch her.”

ever since we fell out over our tree that is all she has to offer.”

***************

“So what about the people from number eight?”

“He used to work from home and work till late,

until he got shopped to the County Council,

from a so called Goodie friend, that was evil.”

***************

“So what about the funny man at number nine?”

“Him and Eight if you know what I mean get on fine,

Number Ten belongs to a family called Granger,

Nice but the boys and their bikes spell danger.”

***************

“Is there mush beyond there you know?” asked Doreen finally

“Just number Eleven a family we get on with at last actually,

He has the big noisy brute of a Range Rover wagon

the his engine you could hear from Dover to London.”

***************

When Mavis had finished her talk.

Bill and Pete went for a short walk

“This is an interesting neighbourhood,

you can find it boring if all of us are good.”

***************

The End