i shall end it now before it’ll begin again;

despite the clamor, all i can hear is your voice;

deep,

inviting,

compelling me to come…

but i shall end it now before it can begin again.

your voice, i shall blend it with the uproar

and it will disappear for good

never to gain contact to my ears again.

from this point onwards my tears will never be alone;

i shall make sure that as my vision starts to blur,

the sky will darken too.

and before a single speck from my eyes can kiss the ground,

thousand drops will fall first from the sky.

and as my tears get lost with the waters,

i know that i am not alone.

now, i shall let go of trust;

to have waters first before i approach the fire,

i shall keep in mind that i can heartlessly burn me

…despite my clear intention to befriend its heat

now i shall let go of transparency;

to have a wall between what to share

and what to selfishly possess

i will never forget the painful fact that what i’ve genuinely given

can be used against me –

despite my willingness to get close.

lastly, i shall let go of the memories,

together with the pictures and letters and hopes

i shall burn them into ashes

and scatter them to wind…

i shall start anew…

without you

without my pain

without my faith

without my generosity

and so it begins.