It was there but now its gone
not on the pillow nor under it too,
not in the bed, or my PJ’s pocket
a mystery thats clearly true
no sign no pain no warning shot
only a gap where a stump remains

Well now its a problem I must face
smile I simply cannot it just wont do
for the gaps in the front
oh my goodness oh dear
a vision in the mirror look at me

Now brother bravery enters the scene
stabbing my vitals twisting slowly again
why…………
I know where I have to be

Bravely I enter the Fang Farriers lair
quivering qaking in despair
reception saying please take a chair
I watch the fish swim round and round
my time is come, he’ll see you now
stay calm stay calm

Gently down into the chair tipping back
anticipation, trepidation still despair
Open wide let me see; ah yes he says
inspecticating me

This we can fix he declares with glee
a bridge a crown a cap two pegs it needs
a few hours work by me and very
soon be smiling again you’ll see
but of course there is always a fee
just short of the national debt for me

There must be another way I plea
oh yes he says I can remove it and
replace it with one of these I mean
yes plastic teeth are all the rage
quite the thing when earnings are lean

He set to work with injection needles and pliers
the stump fought resolutely for almost an hour
firkling and fettling he won in the end
my wailing stopped my trial had been won
now a recluse till the healings done
plastic to be moulded to make me smile again

I left the chair and moved away
His passing shot was remember the rule
with a plastic tooth set it down
with a knob of sugar all alone
the one tooth you will have
watch it ache you see it feels no pain
come and see me again

To his Nurse he says –
I get them all in the end
Teeth hurt when they come
and before I take them away again

next patient please