By now you all know I’m of Italian descent
One thing we never do is hide our ethnic pride
To be sure I’m drawn to spaghetti and meatball scent
When the food is on my plate how funny people
Who don’t know me wonder how quickly it went
I eat it all to fast
And down the journey to my tummy it is all sent
If it is really yummy the belly bulges and the back looks bent
And shortly after this I wish I could repent
But it’s to late for that dinner came and went
Now my stomach starts to growl
It’s starting to feel the worst
Suddenly I feel it there’s going to be a burst
I run into the potty
Feeling the opposite of thirst
Knowing my rear end
Will soon be blowing
Fecal splurts
It shot out of my butt
Like a cannon from a gun
This is the part of the story
Where Bo Jack has his fun
The explosion seemed everlasting
And it really kind of hurt
Like a rectal episiotomy
Like the tearing of a shirt
A volcano of destruction
It reeked havoc
On the tub and the wall
Some of the thick substance
Repainted down the hall
Some of it shot far
High up in the air
Some sprayed all the way
To my living room chair
It was pretty gross
A really sickly sight
But the gut still was sore
So I let it dry
And harden overnight
It was all over the house
My shoes and my knees
Some even
Went up in my nose
It was nasty
And made me sneeze
So I paused for a moment
And pondered
How can this be
That all this nasty
Poop goop
Came out of little old me
I finally concluded
Cleaning could not be eluded
So I put on some gloves
Got out the cleaner
And some scrubs
I scrubbed and scrubbed some more
I scrubbed the wall
I scrubbed the floor
I even scrubbed the bathroom door
I cleaned the rest of the night
With all my earthly might
But the crap would not come off
So we moved
At the dawns
Early light!!