Johny’s got an island

In the Surrey countryside

It isn’t very long

And it isn’t very wide

It’s got a little duck house

There’s a tree upon the bank

And on a summers evening

You can smell the septic tank

The views are quite amazing

To the south, the railway track

The slaughterhouse on one side

And the gasworks at the back

But the most outstanding feature

Of this pleasant little ait

There’s no water to surround it

Well, not now at any rate