Disclaimer: Adult material follows… If you read the title and think you might be offended by content of said poem, do not read! It’s meant only to be funny! I wrote this little ditty not too long ago, and I love it! It’s kind of Shel Silverstein/Dr. Suess style wise, but with a decidedly more adult theme.
Reach into my pants and
feel the snake begin to dance
You’ll know you’ve piqued his
interest when he’s reaching straight for you!
You really can’t imagine how
a thing like this could happen,
but when he’d gotten petted
his body grew, and grew, and grew
It grew to such a size
to make the bravest of women cry
“If that were crawling through MY grass
I’m not quite sure what I’d do!”
Treat him rough, or just play gentle
Because he’s not just ornamental
He has a special purpose, and
That purpose is pleasing you!
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