What if father dies?

What would be of me?

Could I bear inside my eyes?

That he no longer breathes?

What if father’s heart

No longer beats inside his chest?

Two hearts will tear apart

When his body is at rest.

But father cannot die

And leave me all alone,

God must hear my cry: “Please don’t take him home!”

I know that he is stubborn, distant, insecure,

I know that he’s been hurtful, careless, and obscure.

But he is still the only man, who’s never walked away,

He stuck around no matter what even till this day.

Oh! Dearest father, if you die I cannot bear,

Oh! Dearest lord, can’t you see how much I care?

But what if really father dies and I am left to mourn,

How much till all my cries

Are deep enough to drown my scorn?

At forty-one because of booze, father cannot die, at nineteen I cannot lose because father, is still mine.