When I met an orc,

I called him a dork.

Then he took a pitchfork

And stabbed my pet stork.

He claimed he invented the pork-

Matic Cooker 3002.

He next went inside and stole my best shoe

And lit it on fire.

It was his desire

To buy a new lyre,

And hurl it out the window

At his dog Bingo.

Then he picked up a bed

And threw it at my head.

That’s all I remember

Of last November.