Uh oh, there you are again,

Looks like I can’t outrun you,

And I’m forced to listen to you

Blather on about nothing,

With that nasal-sounding voice

Of yours.

I hate the way you laugh

After everything you say,

As if that’s going to make it sound funny.

But it doesn’t.

And I can’t stand the way,

You say, “No offense,”

All the time,

But then go ahead,

And say something

Offensive.

You are like a wad of gum,

Stuck to my shoe,

Nagging, annoying, ridiculous,

Cloying,

You’re so fake,

I don’t even know how

You can believe you’re for

Real.