OK – I am no motivational expert, but I am a qualified Performance Coach. However, more importantly, I am just an ordinary human being like you. So what I say now say, although not earth shattering in itself,  may just be some use to you, if you are willing to take it on board.

It will only take a few minutes of your time from a busy day, but if you are willing to spend those minutes with me, I am going to take a selection of three quotes for this month, and share them below. I also want to share with you how we can implement these each day – and how we will all benefit from them if we do!

Firstly – let’s all try to learn from the past, but look to the future. Read the quote below:

“When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.”
— Alexander Graham Bell

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How many times have you regretted something that you have done; been really hard on yourself because of it; maybe this has stopped you from moving forward and getting on with the rest of your life – or at least from enjoying your life, as you should?

This might be, typically, in a relationship, or perhaps a career move. When that “one door closes” have you stood on this side of it, trying to get back in? How long did it take you to realise that the door is firmly locked from the inside!  Sometimes, we cannot go back, only look back. And the only way to go is forward…. try to realise that and realise that there are a lot of people who are locked on the outside of that same door with you. Just turn around and you will find that you are not alone out there.  If you stopped trying the door handle on the door that just closed, you could open the new door instead.

Sometimes you may feel that it is still worth trying to find the key to unlock that door. For instance, working a little harder at what was fundamentally a good relationship that you know you yourself have let go bad. Remember here that saying “Sorry” doesn’t hurt – it actually heals. But if you know for a fact that the door has been locked and the key thrown away, take the advice above. Try to learn from the past, but look to the future.  Don’t waste your life regretting what might have been. Learn to move on……

Secondly – Avoid any negative people and/or situations that you may find yourself in: 

“Those who are lifting the world upward and onward are those who encourage more than criticize.”
— Elizabeth Harrison

Negative people seem to attract negative things. I’m not saying that it is not possible for people to have misfortune and to want to sometimes get this off their chest, or to complain – that’s only human, and we have all been there at sometime (and sadly in life, some people do sometimes suffer more than most) – but if you know someone who – not matter how fortune smiles upon them – is always negative, always complaining, always in a bad mood, always looking for the worst (in people, in situations, even in life itself) then do yourself a favour: AVOID them! They are known as “energy vampires” and that’s what they do – suck the energy and joy of life out of you.

Oh, they probably don’t mean to …. it is “just their way” – but that is no excuse. Being around an energy vampire can be both mentally and physically exhausting – a complete waste of your energy, as it matters not how hard you try to bolster them or assist them, they will not accept your gift of encouragement. Instead they will turn it into a negative, and somehow end up making you feel bad too. Understand that they don’t want you to make them feel better, they just want to make you feel as miserable as they do!

Better therefore to seek out like minded people who don’t moan, groan and complain constantly. You will feel better about yourself if you are around people who are as encouraging to you, as you are to them. Together – both you and they - will feel better, more energised and happier all round. Positive energy will expand and you will not feel as drained, or as unhappy as you may otherwise become around lots of ”negative energy” people.  You owe it to yourself to be as happy and positive as you can be with whatever life gives you – don’t let others undermine this with their own unhappy thoughts.

Lastly – Teach those in your care to do the right thing . . .  

“Correction does much, but encouragement does more.”
— Goethe

When we have children, we have a gift given to us. Let’s help the small people of today, to become the great people of tomorrow by encouraging them to do the right thing as best we can.  We are none of us perfect, but we can strive to be as nice to others as we can. What goes round, comes around, as they say, and let us try to “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. And this doesn’t just apply to our offspring.

Employers take note! You can encourage your staff to achieve more if you find words of motivations and encouragement… this works better than a telling off for some minor failing. Remember, a good manager (or teacher) praises profusely in public, but offers constructive criticism in private. Let’s help each other out here!

Whoever we care for in our lives, especially our children, will learn to associate that “feel good factor” (that which we all enjoy of being praised and encouraged) with the right sorts of behavioural patterns… and that bad behaviour does not earn them the same feeling. Encourage, motivate, enjoy – and learn to relax with it all.