A School Story is a new fictional story that I’m currently writing. I hope you will like it.


Yes, I finished my homework project on integrated circuits. Are you kidding me? I’ve got a machete in my backpack. Will I get suspended? Probably. No more bad grades this semester.

(walks in to the principal’s office)

Hello Mr. Jigglypants. May I come in or should I wait until I will get called in.

Mr. Jigglypants:

Hi Steve, What did you do this time?

Oh, I see you got a knife. May I borrow that?

(Takes machete out of the case. Opens a top drawer of his desk and gets out a breadboard and a loaf of bread. Picks up a machete and carefully slices the loaf into thin pieces. After that he wipes out the crumbs off machete with his finger, puts machete back into the case and closes the case. Then he hands machete back to Steve.)

Thanks, you may go back to class.


(Puts machete back into his backpack.)

Are you sure?

Mr. Jigglypants:

Yes, go on. (Gets a jar of jelly from under his desk.) Don’t look at me like that. I’m not going to share. I’m not supposed to promote unhealthy foods in a public school.


(Walking out of the office.)

See you later than.

(Walks across the hallway into the physics class.)

Hello Mr. K.-Watt.

Mr. Wasted Kaiser-Watt:

How many times have I asked not to call me that name. Mr. Kaiser, just Mr. Kaiser. Is it that hard to say?


Not at all, Mr. Wasted Watt.

Mr. Wasted Kaiser-Watt:

Ok, that’s it! To the principal’s office!


You see, I’m just from there. Mr. Jigglypants is having his morning tea.

Mr. Waisted Kaiser-Watt:

Ok, I’m going to write a referral.

(Opens his desk drawer.)

Who stole my referral sheets? I’m going to write a referral for each of you!

(Class laughs)

Mr. Wasted Kaiser-Watt:

(Runs out of the class.)


I guess that means the class is cancelled.

(Opens a gradebook, rips a page out and makes a paper plane. Launches a plane as he walks out of the classroom.)

(Walks down the hall to the Biology classroom. No one is there, so he crosses the room and heads straight to the greenhouse. He walks to the other end of greenhouse and stops in front of a flower pot.)

There it is. My greatest creation. My own weed tree.

(In the middle of the pot, there is a tiny marijuana plant.)

Oh no! It’s dying! There is only one thing that can save it.

(Gets a ripled piece of paper out of his pants’ pocket. Flattens the paper on the table. Pulls the plant with its root and places it on the paper. Rolls the paper. Gets a lighter out and takes a deep smoke. About a minute pases and he starts to sing.)

There’s a fire starting in my heart

Reaching a feverpitch, it’s bringing me out the dark.

Mr. Ice Mauk-Wede:

Steve! Is it you again?

(Finds Steve sitting next to a table.)

Ok, where is your cannabis plant?


I’m afraid you are too late. It died like a real hero, by the fire.

(Picks up the rest of the blunt and tries to produce an evil laugh. After couple seconds starts to caugh.)

Mr. Ice Mauk-Wede:

Ok, lets get you to the nurse.

(Picks up Steve and walks him out of the room, up past principal’s office and through the second door on the right to the nurse.)

Mrs. Ive Ray Pedall:

(Sitting at a desk, grinding her nails. Her feet are on the top of the table.)

(On top of the desk there is a sign that reads, “Busy, please come back later.”)

Liked it
  • Dark Fairy on Apr 12, 2012

    That was a funny story. Was this supposed to be a play?

  • IQLion on Apr 19, 2012

    It was intended to be. Thanks for reading.

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