When this ended i was heartbroken and lost. That summer i became addicted to smoking pot every day multiple times. All of my money went to buying sacks.

I started to drink to get ridiculously drunk. it was easy all during juinor high because my dad would buy us cigarettes and alcohol. In the beginning of freshman year i was clean. As i turned 14 Soon after i was introduced to a new crazy life. I was in the habit of living this lifestyle full of substance and being brave. It comforted me. This was the year of drunken girl hood. I experimented with ecstacy, shrooms, adderal, xanax.

I came to my moment of truth when i had taken E two days in a row, just to come down into a horrible depression. I had never felt such anguish and desperation inside my mind. My only cure was drugs. I started losing consciousness and ended up in the hospital once. I made my whole family miserable. i lost touch with what is most important to me and it brought me to the worst mistake of my life when i was taken advantage of at a party.

I felt it was a turning point, only to keep using and abusing. Now im suffering the consequences of regret, and being lost inside my self. I dont know where to turn to. I like to think these are just learning experiences but this feeling of being helpless eats away at my heart.

I want to turn my life around and be worthy of true love and true friendship.