He picked up the shoe and threw it into the garbage can.  It would have gone in one toss, but he had not emptied the can in at least a month.  It rebounded off of the refuse on top and landed squarely on the floor, taunting him by facing heel upwards, waiting for the soft parts of his foot to come close.  He stood up again and limped towards the sink.  When he arrived he leaned on the edge of the sink, putting his left hand right on top of the toothpaste, causing it to shoot the cap off and squirt toothpaste all over the place and him.  Cursing yet again he scraped the goo off of his bare belly and wiped it on the sink.

He glanced into the mirror and got a good look at himself.  He looked terrible, dark rings under his eyes, disheveled hair, and stubble covering his chin.  His eyes were so bloodshot he could have passed for a B-horror movie monster.  He rubbed his chin, trying to think of a way to dodge shaving; he shook his head, knowing he was stuck with the razor.  He grabbed his toothbrush and then scraped some of the excess toothpaste off of the sink and put it in his mouth.  It was so dry that the he could not get the toothpaste to foam up properly so he stuck the gooey mass under the faucet for a moment and then proceeded to brush his teeth.

After finishing he rinsed his mouth out and discovered the smell in his apartment, it was him.  He smelled himself again to be sure, but almost vomited from his own odor.  He was having difficulty figuring out he got to smelling so bad, most of last night was a blur to him.  He quickly scrapped the stubble off of his chin with a dull razor, wincing and managing to only nick himself once.  Then he crawled into the shower, which felt amazing and was beginning to restore a modicum of humanity to his presence.

He was actually feeling a lot better when he exited and was actually smiling.  He popped a couple of pieces of bread in the toaster and started to select some clothes for work.  By the time he had his slacks on the toaster popped up the toast.  He buttoned up his shirt grabbed a piece and began chewing it.  After his shoes and tie were securely in place he grabbed his briefcase and headed for the door.  On the way he grabbed his second piece of toast.  Stuffing it in his mouth he grabbed his keys and exited the apartment.  He was balancing his briefcase and the keys when his cell phone rang.  Cursing he dropped the briefcase, the keys slipped and to top it off he let go of the remainder of his toast.  He yanked his phone out of his pocket and answered it.

“Yo!”  Hello was too old school for him.  “Yeah man, last night was A-mazing!”  He bent down and began to retrieve his briefcase and keys.  “You know I am down for some more action tonight, can you think of any reason why I wouldn’t be?”  He stood back up, kicked the last bite of his toast down the hallway and headed off to work, still chatting away on his phone, his worldly woes forgotten as his mind was on the night’s festivities yet to come.