Colonel M nodded after viewing the last slide of the briefing, yet his stern face showed no real satisfaction. “Okay,” he said quietly through tight lips. Once the projector clicked off, he swept his pointed yet somewhat accusing finger around the table at the staff. “Anyone have anything else to add?”

Each member at the table shook their heads “no”, desperately wanting the meeting to end and go about his business. Then the finger paused at me, and the Colonel pointedly stated, “J, see me in my office after this meeting.” Then he continued to sweep his finger past me around to the shaking heads.

“All right, then. That’s it,” said the Colonel as he stood from his seat. On instinct, everyone in the room popped to attention. There was complete silence as the commander took his time gathering his slides, enjoying the idea of his staff catering to his whims. Once he exited the room, everyone relaxed then silently gathered their materials and departed. At least they were lucky enough to go back to work. I discovered from the meeting I’ve got a stack of overdue performance reports due tomorrow morning. Now, I get to see the commander. Yeah…this was going to be a great day.

Before I could formally report in, Colonel M motioned to the couch across from his desk. “Close the door and sit down.” This was not a good sign. I sat upright on his couch as if a school marm was correcting my posture.

The commander sank into a massive leather chair and touched his fingertips together. “Captain J,” he began stiffly, “Do you know why I called you into my office…again?”

I paused. I think it had something to do with the delinquent troop we discussed last night. “Sir, is it about Sergeant A mistakenly getting the training slot and Group Headquarters finding out about it?” I asked cautiously.

“That’s part of it,” the Colonel replied, emphatically nodding his head as if he had more to accuse me of. “I find it disconcerting, Captain, that your Chief knew about the situation before you did.”

I furrowed my brow. I wanted to tell the commander I was often the last to know these things because he had the tendency to call my Chief before calling me. This was just a paper trail mistake we didn’t catch in time. No big deal. However, I remained silent, though somewhat annoyed by the accusation.

The commander continued his lecturing, ticking off all my mistakes on his fingers. “I can never seem to get you on your cell phone.”

Oh, I got everyone of his calls. Believe me.

“Your section has the most safety-related incidents.”

Mostly athletic injuries, really.

“None of your troops can pass the PT test, including you.”

Only three out of 250!

“But the fact remains,” the commander barked rather suddenly, making me jump in my seat. “You’ve been in the squadron for only two months, and I can’t seem to trust your leadership AND,” he added emphatically, widening his eyes and then narrowing them in disgust, “You had the audacity to call a “peace” luncheon with me last week to straighten things out. What the hell kind of pansy crap is that, J?”

I was stunned. My ears felt like they were burning. I personally wanted to meet with the commander to know how I could better serve the mission. Perhaps “peace” luncheon was the wrong choice of words, but how dare he spit on my attempts to improve our serious lack of communication. I was livid. I wanted to cuss him out at this very moment, but I strained to maintain a sense of decorum. “Audacity, Sir?” I shouted back, surprising even myself. “You call my attempts to clarify communications with you audacity?”

The Colonel scowled. “This is exactly what I’m talking about, J. Excuses.”

“Sir,” I continued firmly. “Yesterday, you wanted to work with the troops so I arranged for you to work on Friday with them. Then, when I follow up, you denied ever making the request. You tell me go left when you mean right. You tell me up when you mean down. I can’t read you mind, Sir.”

“You’re a captain, almost a major,” the Colonel replied. “I don’t have time to sit down and explain every little detail to you. Do you know how busy I am as a commander?”

I closed my eyes briefly and breathed. “Sir, that’s what I’m trying to tell you I don’t understand your instructions. They are confusing. If I can’t understand them, how am I expected to tell my troops to follow them?”

“You’re pathetic, J. You know that?” Colonel M blurted out. “You have the biggest section in the entire squadron – look at the way you’re sitting! I can tell you are clearly annoyed. You are one of four officers – FOUR officers – in the entire squadron who’s head of her own section, yet you still mess things up. Why can’t you be more like V?”

Despite my colleague’s best efforts, V’s section had more failed inspections than mine due to his sloppy predecessor who, interestingly enough, was an M favorite. Besides, my specialty and V’s were completely different. That didn’t seem to stop the commander from pitting us against each other.

“Sir, I am not V. You’ve got to either tell me how you want things done or you need to let me do my job as a flight commander.”

For a split second, I thought I detected a hint of approval from the Colonel, but he wasn’t about to let up. “You know, J,” he said rather pointedly, turning his head away for a moment and then glaring back at me. “ I have a mind right now to bust you down to CCX.”

Not administration and plans again. I’ve already done that.

“That’s right,” the commander continued, noticing my look of disappointment. “I have a mind to remove you from your section of 250 people, exchange you with R, you take her section of ten people and go right back to doing what you did before. You’re lucky I haven’t given you an Article 15. Now, that’s a real career killer.”

I was not happy about losing TR, my award-winning transportation section. The Colonel himself selected it for me to increase my chances of making Major. I still felt I did nothing wrong, but if TR had to go to someone else, then R was the right choice.

“Well…” I continued, somewhat wounded yet indignant. “You do what you have to do, Sir. I’ve already said my piece.” I was so fired.

The Colonel sat back in his chair, silently drew a long breath and touched his fingertips together a few times. After what seemed like an eternity, he announced in a somewhat lighter tone, “All right. Maybe I’ll give you another shot at TR to really test your leadership. But this is your last-and I mean your last-chance with me.”

“Yes, Sir,” I replied cautiously but overjoyed.

“Fine. You can go,” the Colonel waved me off dismissively.

I quickly got up and exited the room before the commander changed his mind. As I closed the door behind me, I was met by a slew of sympathetic eyes from the secretary to the poor hapless airman who was to see the commander next. I quickly walked past them, averting their gaze.

“Captain J. Captain J, wait!” called a woman’s voice from the hallway. It was the plump blonde First Sergeant running towards me as I was leaving the building. The First Sergeant, or “First Shirt” as we like to call them, acted as the squadron counselor, advisor or friend when needed. “Captain J, you okay?” she asked in a pleasant Southern accent.

“Yeah, I’m all right,” I smiled meekly. This was the first time I actually welcomed the sight of the Shirt instead of trying to avoid her incessant talking.

The Shirt waved her arms exasperatedly and shook her head, “You two were so loud, I could hear you through the door. At one point, I just had to get up and walk away.”

“I’m sorry, Shirt. I didn’t realize we were disturbing you.”

“Oh no, Captain,” she waved it off. “I just want to make sure you’re okay. We all know how the commander can get.” Then she lowered her voice, despite the fact no one was around us, “Good for you standing up for yourself. I’ve seen him do that to every captain that comes through this squadron. You’re the only one who stuck to her guns.”

“Really?” I asked, my spirits suddenly lifting. “Thank you, Shirt.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. Listen, if you ever feel like you need to talk, you know where to find me. Okay, Captain? See you later.” With that, she returned to her office.

I left the building smiling to myself over my little triumph. The commander may have gotten the upper hand, but in my mind, this was a major breakthrough. It might just turn out to be a good day after all.