He should have known that the end was near. Had the council promised to review his case within the year, he could have confidently expected several centuries to pass without hearing from them. They had promised to review his case after twenty-five centuries, and a year to the day after his last hearing, he was drinking vinegar beer in a dark corner of his usual pub, when he was once more whisked in front of the council.
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He was again in a cavernous room, on a hard wooden chair, staring at the massed assembly of the Eternal Powers while his beer slopped embarrassingly on his trousers. The room was almost empty, he saw with a surge of hope as he gazed at six scowling Devils, and six frowning Angels on their comfortable thrones. His hope was dashed when the Chairman, looking distastefully at his beer mug, remarked, “we have considered the evidence…”
“Wait a minute,” he cried. “Don’t I get to present my case?”
“Oh, this is not a hearing,” the Chairman said with a cunning smile. “This is simply a judgment, levied upon you in absentia, pertaining to your conduct as Governor of Limbo56 over the last century.” Arthur opened his mouth. “I think you’ll find,” the Chairman continued, that the Tribuneral has every right to do so under our laws. “I cite the precedent established in the case of ‘Three Wise Men vs. Pharisees’, section eight, sub-section…” and he continued in this vein for several minutes. When he had finished, a cherub presented Arthur with an extremely dusty law-book. Bent under its weight, and sneezing uncontrollably, he was unable to continue with his objections.
This time the Devils made no pretense of listening to the mind-numbing drone of the head Angel. From beneath their hoods, they chatted amongst themselves. They were, he supposed, gloating over the fall of one more Governor of Limbo56. He had outlasted all the others and he refused to feel sorry about the way he had governed the place. It had been a limbo on the very edge of Hell when he took over, and he had kept the miserable place and its inhabitants out of the pit for a hundred years. He had broken many rules, dealt with criminals in the outside world and Devils below. He had subverted a cherub third class; his accountant had cooked the books, his Politician had bribed politicians still living, and his Criminal had, after death, achieved his lifelong ambition of becoming a feared killer, albeit a killer of killers. For a few years, due to Arthur’s actions, his Intermediates had enjoyed an existence comparable to that in the outside world. He was not going to apologize for that. He squared his shoulders.
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