I recently spent a day with my ten year old son that neither one of us had been looking forward to.  Upon recounting the tale to a group of friends, however, they were so amused by the day’s events, that they insisted it be my next story.  So here it is…and on the advice of one aforementioned friend, names have been changed to protect the innocent….namely, my son!!

     As I mentioned, this was NOT a typical Mother/Son day.  Definitely a toss-up over who was dreading it more, Troy, my ten and half year old son, or myself.  For on this day, we were off to see the Urologist.  Or, as I told Troy, the “penis Doctor”.  And now, my friends, you are as uncomfortable as my son and I were when we headed out the door together!  My husband and I have four children.  Troy is both our oldest, and our only son.  When he was born, we made a conscious, and educated, decision to not circumcise him.  At the age of seven, an undescended testicle was discovered, and he had minor surgery to repair this.  We were told by the surgeon at that time that his foreskin was not retracting, and he recommended circumcision, but said we still had time to see if it would “sort itself out” so to speak.  And now, here we are, three years later, headed back to the penis Doctor, because, no, it had not “sorted itself out”!  

     We sat in the waiting room, my son and I, me feeling a mother’s guilt and distress for the pain my child was in, (and would most certainly be in if he needed the surgery!), and he, feeling the fear and apprehension of the exam that lay ahead.  I looked over at my precious child, and noting the panic in his face, reached out to hug him close to me.  He began to tear up…I as well, though I tried to hide it from him.  I glanced around the room, which had quite a few other men waiting for their own uncomfortable exams, and nudged him.  Leaning close, I whispered, “Cheer up, it could be worse.  Imagine being the Doctor, all he does all day long is look at penises.  Note to self, never become a penis Doctor!”.  My son swiped at a tear, and a grin spread across his face.  As we both started giggling, his name was called, & off we went, hand in hand, to face the music.

     Thankfully, Dr. Penis was very kind, and very quick.  Troy was visibly relieved when it was over so easily.  However, as we feared, there was simply no choice here.  He would need to be circumcised, and given his age, sooner, rather than later.  As we drove home, I again wrestled with my own emotions, and again, that guilt that we mother’s are able to foster so deeply when it comes to our children.  I finally composed myself enough to ask my son if he had any thoughts or questions.  We discussed the procedure, and I did my best, as someone totally lacking the parts or the experience, to describe all the “ins and outs” of the male anatomy.  I stopped for gas, and as I drove away, Troy leaned up from the back seat and asked if I had bought him a chocolate bar or treat.  I shrugged and replied, “No, why?  Should I have?”.  His response, my precious, wonderful child, who had just suffered through quite an ordeal for a young boy, with even worse to come, will forever ring in my ears as one of the highlights of all my years as a mother.  With that quiet, deadpan way of his, blue eyes twinkling, a little smirk on his lips, my son responded, “Well, I DID just have my penis examined by some strange Doctor dude, Mom!  I think THAT deserves a treat!”.  As I dissolved into laughter, (with various adult quips struggling to NOT cross my lips in the presence of my son), the stress and tension of our shared experience melted away, and a “not so typical” Mother/Son day turned into a bonding moment beyond compare. 

     And of course, a great story to regale my friends with later that day, adult quips and all!