Life is full of bad smells and disappointments.
Where’s mine? via Wikipedia
When I was a small and impressionable child I had high hopes for the future. I was entirely confident that the world I live in today would be a wonderland of peace, beauty and wizardry. I didn’t really want to be a superhero or even a super-villain as that seemed like too much work and responsibility – “Oh somebody save us” or “plans within plans”. I think even then I knew I would ultimately lead a life of apathy. There were however a few primary things I wanted to have happen by this point in my life – and well – they haven’t. It’s a massive disappointment and I am currently looking for somebody to blame. I’m inclined to blame religion and politics, or perhaps geomagnetic anomalies on the Jupiter moon Io.
I’d like to say that the misery I call current day existence is a direct reflection of these disappointments – and I will, because it’s true. I therefore present to you the four primary disappointments that have led to the great Duff disillusionment of the 21st century. If after reading this you don’t want to go and kill yourself, or somebody else you hate, then you are already dead.
There have been many technological marvels that have occurred over the last couple of decades and there were very many I would have liked to have seen come to fruition. It would have been significantly cool to have hotels in space; domestic robots that cook, clean and relieve sexual tension; and a freaking damn space elevator. These are however things that I can live without – for now – but the lack of Jet Packs and Lightsabres is beyond unforgivable. Somebody must answer for this travesty.
For the longest time my boyhood day dreams would see me flying to work from a standing takeoff at speeds in excess of 200km/hr. This would not have been without issues of course, for the bothers of the two dimensional ground based transport system would be confounded many fold by careless jet packers darting across the sky while talking on their mobiles and ingesting quantities of illicit drugs. Even so, I am sure the problems wouldn’t have been insurmountable and I think the risk to my mortal life entirely acceptable. The biggest problem I could realistically see with jet pack transport is figuring out where to put my thermos cup of coffee.
Ohh chocolate bars…….damn it, I love them. I hate running too. Maybe you can take up dancing? It doesn’t feel like torture 
Great story and video! You did a wonderful job with this challenge. 
Hehehehahahaha..I’ve read this over and over ‘Koala Boy’..hehehehehahahaha..and tis of a wild boy Duff D moss..he was his father’s only hope, his mother’s pride and joy ..loved this Duff
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