Its the quiet ones you have to worry about.

Ezekial’s Mule

The other day I saw Ezekiel.  You remember Ezekiel?  No?

Well, Ezekiel was a old school gold prospector, panned the hills behind Dead Man’s Gulley, he did, be gone half a year at a stretch.

Well, there was this one time Ezekiel came into town for supplies, just shy of dusk, and he was tired and thirsty after walking all day.  He was headed for the stable to bed his mule down when a young buck with paired matching pistols staggered out of the saloon drunk and randy for a fight, bottle in hand, and saw old Ezekiel, thin as a willow, and scoffed him loudly:

“Hey old man, you old geezer, you ever dance?  You wanna dance?” he boldly challenged, took a swallow of whiskey, and drew his pistols.

“No, I never did dance, I guess I never wanted to dance, see, I…”

“Well, you’re gonna dance now old man!  Dance!”  and proceeded to shoot bullets at the old man’s feet, causing the old man to dance so as not to lose a toe or worse.

“Dance, you old bastard” the young gunslinger laughed and emptied his two six shooters at the old man’s feet.  Everybody was laughing, and when the pistols were empty and the fun was over, the young shooter holstered his guns, picked up his bottle and turned to re-enter the saloon.

But before the young man got two steps he heard the unmistakable sound of a double barreled shotgun being cocked behind his back.  Not one of those city shotguns either, this one was loaded for bear, and the double click was the only thing to be heard as the laughing stopped abruptly and the old prospector said:

“Boy, did you ever kiss a mule’s ass?”

The young man turned around, ashen faced, and looked at the old man, trying to find some bluff, but there was none there.

“No, but I always wanted to” was his reply.

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http://www.triond.com/users/LewSethics

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http://relijournal.com/religion/adams-testicle/

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http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-the-watering-hole/

http://authspot.com/novels/one-day-at-the-watering-hole-2/

http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-the-watering-hole-silence-is-golden/

http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-the-boneless-chicken-farm/

http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-the-watering-hole-or-blasedon-you-the-one/

http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-the-races-the-brontosaurus-one-hundred-yard-dash/

http://authspot.com/short-stories/one-day-at-schroedingers-cat-house/

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http://purpleslinky.com/humor/whale-oil-the-arizona-whale-wars/

http://purpleslinky.com/humor/whale-oil-not-just-for-breakfast-anymore/

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http://www.picable.com/photographers/LewSethics.274182/1

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7
Liked it
  • yes me on Jan 26, 2011

    I heard this another way somewhere that was a hoot Lew and there I was just gonna get the posse out for you too a great share for the laugh of it cheers

  • Yovita Siswati on Jan 26, 2011

    nice story.

  • Goodselfme on Jan 27, 2011

    There were bullies in them their days too, I reckon! I liked the story but mostly the revengeful end. Thank you for the bed time story. WEll done!

  • CHIPMUNK on Jan 27, 2011

    well informed

  • SowmyaT on Jan 27, 2011

    Nice share

  • Linvio on Jan 28, 2011

    very enjoyable piece.

  • SharifaMcFarlane on Jan 29, 2011

    Way to go Ezekiel.

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