Although my mother cooked nearly all the time when I was a child, there were times when there was just not enough time to cook a full scale meal.  In crises like this, my family would pop a 10” frozen pizza – a Tony’s frozen pizza – in the oven, turn the old-school knob to 400 degrees Fahrenheit, and await the coming of the most spectacularly simple creation of food to ever nest itself among the small, frail race of humankind.  However, in a future day, my mind would be shattered into a million shards of surprised enlightenment. 

                Store-bought frozen pizza is hardly ever described as a delicacy, but, to children, such a wonder could never be replaced.  Although weeks went by between each juicy, warm, mouth-watering pizza was devoured, I never gave up hope.  I knew that one day I would smell that semi-fresh bread-and-cheese scent again.  I would taste that mixture of divine importance upon my tongue.  As far as food goes, Tony’s frozen pizzas steadied themselves at the top of the pyramid.

                As time progressed, my passion for Tony’s frozen pizza never stopped.  Only a year or two ago, I remember the fragrance of a pizza winding its way to my nostrils, and the sudden release of saliva as that wondrous smell caressed every single receptor in my olfactory epithelium.  Suddenly feeling unnervingly hungry, I found my way to the kitchen and watched the pizza being cut into eight delectable little pieces.  After growing exponentially hungrier as it was being sliced, the pizza began calling my name, and I answered with a quick flick of my forearm, shoving a piece of pizza into my maw.  The completely corrupt feeling of hunger was soon destroyed that evening.

                One day, not too long ago, as my mother was returning from her weekly grocery shopping, I looked through the bags for the frozen Tony’s pizza, but I found something almost entirely different!  This specific bag contained a 17” Wal-mart Great Value frozen pizza!  Truly heart-broken, I asked my mom why she got a Great Value pizza.  She replied with a piece of indifference in her voice, “They were out of Tony’s, and this looked pretty good.”  As a matter of fact, it actually looked rather disturbing.  I remember it raining the rest of the evening.

                Eventually, having nothing else to eat in the house, we children agreed on giving the abomination a try.  Fifteen minutes after blatantly tossing the thing into the oven, a strange aroma filled the house.  An aroma that, astoundingly, smelled like pizza!  Rushing to the kitchen and determining that it’s was at its ripest, I ripped the pizza out of the over, carefully slid it onto the top of the stove, and stared at it.  There were beams of light seemingly radiating from it, and I do believe I heard a choir singing in the distance!  A drop of drool falling off my lower lip forced me back to reality where I grabbed the pizza-cutting scissors and began to cut the pizza into 8 pieces.  Not able to resist its tantalizing charms any longer, I started chomping on the closest piece before I had even thought about obtaining a plate.  The rest of the day was bright and clear.

                Growing up only eating the Tony’s brand of frozen pizza made me somewhat single minded about pizza.  I failed to realize that there may have been a better item of the same category.  The puny Tony frozen pizzas are nothing Wal-mart’s Great Value frozen pizzas.  Returning to buying and eating the Tony pizza is never happening again.