Alan Mackay (41), following his 2 week-long stay in Aberdeen Royal Infirmary for a broken right leg complicated by a bout of E-coli, propped up his blue and purple cushions, reclining on the lounge sofa in his rented Menzies Road, Torry, flat.  A musty smell of natural gas and old newspapers pervaded the room.  Scanning through the Christmas/New Year edition of Radio Times for anything worthwhile to watch he settled on Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, which had already been on for over half an hour.

An interior shot of the ornate grand fireplace and chapel at Hogwarts set the scene for another climactic showdown between Harry and Voldemort.  Suddenly, a high-pitched squeaking sound emitted from the kitchen boiler followed by a loud knocking noise, then silence.  ‘Damn, another boiler breakdown; great timing, coldest winter in 50 years,’ he muttered.  Alan tried the Scottish Gas customer hotline – it was engaged, again.

Within 20 minutes, the room temperature had dropped 10 degrees to a cool 48 degrees Celsius, the thermometer showed. Alan made his way to the hall, put on his sheepskin coat, Aberdeen 1983 Cup Winners’ Cup Final scarf, wool mittens and red Tommy Cooper-style fez, a souvenir from an Egyptian holiday.  Returning to his mobile phone, with only a cooling cup of Earl Grey tea and an old Tesco prawn mayonnaise sandwich, he settled in for a long wait and a frustrating ordeal at the mercy of Scottish Gas’s call-queuing system.