Camped out in another rainy and gloomy day in the jungle, the 251st Division of the Army woke to the majestic sound of the private’s bugle. Despite the rain and the consequent rust, the private started to belt out all the notes that made up the company’s song. As the private held the last note for a musical touch, he suddenly stumbled backwards into the jungle floor. The private’s head suddenly was impaled with a now-bloody bayonet. Unknown to them, a whole platoon of Reds waited in ambush in the concealment of the leafy willows. As professional soldiers, they made no hesitation in holding every single member at gun-point and some at knife-point. The highest ranking soldier of the Reds walked over to the 251st Division’s Captain. “Sergei!” screamed one of the Reds as his bloody intestines spilled out from the sharp blade of a katana. The general of the Reds turned around in response, and he saw something that scared the living shit out of him. His whole platoon (minus him of course) had just turned more Red. No, they didn’t join another Soviet Union… They were all slaughtered by an unknown assailant…

Sergei ran to his corporal, touched his cheek, and he examined his wounds. “These a-a-a-are…all made by a katana!” Sergei frantically thought to himself. Sergei knew he had to get out of this scaredy-cat phase, and move on to the tough G.I. Joe phase if he wanted to make it out of this hell hole alive. Thinking quickly, he pulled out his AK-47, and he quickly scanned the jungle for any possible tangos. Now Sergei had been alive for more than 50 years, and he had his own share of guerrilla warfare. However, this vigilante he was fighting was no pushover, and furthermore this assassin had both the advantage of surprise and speed. Sergei heard a noise coming from his behind, the kind of noise that only comes from someone stepping on grass. Sergei screamed, “Big mistake!” He turned around as quickly as his 500-pound body would allow him, and he just emptied magazine after magazine into the jungle.

Sergei heard a body drop dead into the jungle ee floor, and he quickly ran towards it to confirm his victory. As he ran towards the sound, the ground suddenly gave way into a quicksand pit! He thought to himself, “shit.” As a strong, big, merciless, and high-ranking man about to suffer the cruelest of fates, he did the only thing that such a man would do. He screamed like he hadn’t screamed before, “Heeeeeelp me! I don’t want to die! I’m too young to die now. Waaaaaaaah, I just want to go home! “His unknown assailant quickly appeared before him.”Big mistake” the assailant retorted with a slight Japanese accent. It would seem that Sergei had made the mistake of trespassing on Ninja Territory. This ninja had one last thing to say to Sergei, “Newton’s Law of Motion”. Sergei exclaimed, “Whaaaa?”. “Force is equivalent to the product of mass and acceleration.” “How is that relevant to this fight?” “Get this genius, given your large appetite for food, you don’t have long to live.” And indeed, this ninja was right; Sergei sunk even deeper into the quicksand pit, as he was inundated by over 500 gallons of quicksand. His dying scream was a scream muffled by all the quicksand. But, the jungle heard it. Yes, the jungle does not miss anything. What remains in the Jungle stays in the Jungle..

“Hold on a second! That story makes no sense at all, “exclaimed the kid.”I told you it was a fictional story..” explained Dave. “But, why are some kind of Americans, Russians, and Japanese doing in some jungle. And weirder, why is this taking place in New York City? New York City doesn’t have a jungle, and there aren’t even any quicksand pits in America period…” the kid questioned. “Kid, kid, kid… You ask way too many questions, and aren’t you supposed to be in school? “The kid responded, “Man, give me a break! Just because you’re a musician and you have a higher rank than me.. That doesn’t mean you can bend logic to your demands. And stop calling me kid! I joined the military when I turned 18, so that people would stop calling me that!” Dave answered, “Whatever kid.. It’s almost time to wake up the soldiers for their raid on these last-remaining Reds.” Dave took out his case, and began to play his bugle in the jungle…