This is probably the craziest thing I’ve ever done so far.

Almost a year ago, I quit teaching and decided to work full-time as an online home-based writer in a small house we are renting atop a mountain overlooking the panorama of Baguio City. Recently, I felt bored working at home so I applied to several companies in Makati. After making it to five companies, I find it hard to choose due to the undisclosed salary. I simply based it on my instinct and chose the one which requires me to ride the elevator every morning to get to my work in the 31st floor of the building.

After my final interview, I went back to Baguio planning to get all the necessary things I needed to relocate to Makati. For two weeks, I received a call almost everyday from my new job asking me to start already. However, I was hesitant so I rescheduled it three times and used the typhoons as my excuse. Though still hesitant, I went to Makati after the typhoons. As soon as I arrived in Makati, I checked the room where I was intending to rent. It was way nicer than my room in Baguio but for some reason, I felt so far away from home then and refused to take it despite the persuasion of the owner.

At that point, I already wanted to go home. It wasn’t nostalgia since it hasn’t been even half a day yet since I left Baguio. I just had this strange feeling that I do not belong there. However, considering that I travelled eight hours from Baguio to Makati, I still went to my new job for my contract signing and orientation.

During the three-hour orientation, I had these thoughts that I will be wearing a company ID to go to work again. Day in day out, I will be ingratiating myself again to my higher-ups, aiming for a fast-track promotion. Again, I will inevitably hear and join conversations about some gossips among the co-workers and avoid being the subject.

The orientation ended at 6PM and I have to report to work the next day at 9AM. That means I have to immediately find a place to stay in Makati in that same night and I was so confused. Then, my best friend, who happens to live in Tondo, called and decided to accommodate me for a night. Apparently, I didn’t go there to hear my best friend’s advice; instead, I wanted him to validate my decision and say, “Yes, you made the right choice,” and not just a simple cliché like, “whatever makes you happy”.

The next morning, my best friend woke me up when I received a text message. It was from my new job. I ignored it. Several calls followed but I ignored them all. I just spent another day with my best friend and went back to Baguio.

I guess I’m not ready yet to be a random stranger working in Makati, the city of skyscrapers and rich people. I still choose to write online in my room in Baguio, the city of chilly mountains so familiar and dear to me.