“She’s a vegetarian, she can’t eat meat.” This from the second woman, who obviously thought I was so dumb as to need a definition of the word vegetarian.

“I apologize, I was not aware of this ma’am, I will get you another sauce, I have a green tomatillio and a ranchero neither of which contain meat or meat stock.” I was already anticipating the kitchen manager screaming at me for wasting food.

“I guess bring me new enchiladas, with both sauces on the side so I can choose which one I like.” The second woman was looking down at her plate very distraught, as though she had come here only to eat that particular sauce.

“I cannot believe you guys wouldn’t print on the menu that the sauce contains meat!” The lady with the habernero chicken tacos yelled at me.

“Ma’am?” I was a little stunned, I was not even sure I had understood her clearly.

“Your menu should clearly state whether or not a sauce is vegan or not!” The taco lady was fuming mad, while the enchilada lady was disappointed.

“Ma’am the menu has a complete description of all of the sauces, besides it is called a peppery meat sauce.” I shouldn’t have even bothered. If you are going to wait on customers just remember never argue, you cannot win.

“I don’t care what it is called!” While her voiced had lowered her anger had not, she was obviously furious. “Now go and bring my friend what she asked for, before I have you fired!”

“Yes ma’am.” There was nothing left for me to say.

Surprisingly the kitchen manager didn’t yell at me when I told him the story, instead he laughed. When I took a step back from the situation I realized just how ridiculous it was. After he remade the enchiladas, which was really quick I ran the food back out to the two ladies. As I went I saw the other servers and kitchen staff smiling at me, the story had spread around the restaurant quickly, and by now everyone was laughing at the pair of ladies.

“Ma’am, your enchiladas, and your two vegan sauces.” I looked her in the eyes and realized something had changed in my absence.

“Peppery meat sauce, I get it now, sorry.” She said. I gave her a wide grin, just to let her know it was all right. She smiled back and I went to my other tables to see what they needed. All was good on the floor again, the smooth sailing had returned. I was flipping my tables and getting decent tips. When at long last the peppery meat sauce ladies looked like they were ready for their check, so I headed on over to their table.

“Ladies, can I get you anything else today?” I said using my ‘I know all you want is the check but I have to this for the corporate suits at the top’ voice.

“Yes, I would like the number to the corporate head office so I can straighten this whole thing out, I want you guys to write your menus more clearly in the future.” The taco lady was at it again. I looked to her friend for help, who looked back at me and just shrugged. Obviously she had tried to talk some sense into her, but simply could not.

“No problem ma’am.” I rattled the number off to her, took their plates and brought them the bill. The ladies split them, taco lady left me nothing, while enchilada lady left me about a 50% tip to make up for her friend. I never heard back from corporate so hopefully she figured it out before calling them, who knows maybe it is a funny story they share with their friends over a glass of wine.