I not only think about her all the time, but she’s vocal in my brain, talking to me with a soft Scouse dialect that makes my hair stand on end. She works at the pub. She’s the new talent behind the bar. Knows it too. Got the confidence that makes guys shake. I don’t shake. Went in there the first night and saw her, like a light had been switched on or something that hadn’t been there before. My mates couldn’t stop talking about her. But I said nothing. I watched the light as it glowed and waited for the right moment. It never came. The bar was too crowded. She was laughing and getting chatted up by every bugger in the place. They got more and more drunk and came out with the most obscene chat up lines I’ve ever heard, and she just threw back her hair, long dark brown hair, and threw them a smile that would make the Pope submit.

“Shona! Hey Shona!”

It was Tom, shouting across the bar, like the toothless git he is. She paid no attention. She was counting her tips. Reg the owner of the bar was pleased as punch. Not only was he getting an overnight doubling of his turnover, but a sly feel up every time their paths crossed for glasses. She was half his age, the pervert. I knew that somehow, if I was to get anywhere with this girl, I’d have to come up with something special.

I left that night without saying anything to her. I needed a plan. It wasn’t enough just to trot out the same old inane chat up lines. She had heard them all before. I needed something special. But what I noticed, walking home that night just two blocks from the pub, the sky was lit up with stars as I had never seen it before. Just a trillion lights in that black night sky!

It was a week before we met up there again. Work had dragged, the evenings restricted to nights in front of the telly with my sister Eileen. Money was tight. “Sticker stuck for cash?” Eileen would say, teasing me the way she always did. Ever since she moved in with me she’s been a pain in the ass. But I hated living alone, and sharing the expenses seemed like a good idea.

“Eileen,” I said to her. “What’s the best chat up you’ve ever heard?”