Oscar Brewis had been a practising psychiatrist for eighteen years.   Usually he found it rewarding work, due to the sense of satisfaction that he felt from helping people with their problems.   But at times it was frustrating listening to the juvenile whinings of neurotics and hypochondriacs.   As he listened to Patricia Marisse relating her latest “adventure”, he understood why psychiatrists have the highest rate of mental breakdowns of all white collar workers.

“He just leapt out at me, Doctor Brewis,” explained Pat Marisse, ignoring the fact that she had been told a dozen times not to call him doctor, since Oscar preferred to be called Mister.   Though unlike many psychiatrists, he was a qualified doctor, with degrees from half a dozen medical organisations.   “Leapt out at me from nowhere and stalked me down the alley…I had to run for my life, nearly three whole blocks…and it was dark…and I stumbled and badly sprained my ankle…and he nearly got me as I had to hobble my way to safety….”

Watching Mrs. Marisse across the desk where they both sat, all one hundred and fifteen kilograms of her, seemingly layer over layer of body mass, quivering and swelling against the seems of her tightly buttoned dress, Oscar found it both difficult and rather nauseating to imagine her running full pelt down an alleyway.   Her normal rate of movement was so painfully slow that it seemed to take her half an hour to walk from the waiting room to the psychiatrist’s office.   On her first couple of visits, Oscar had called her in two or three times, before she reached his office.   Now he simply waited, trying his best to be patient while she ambled toward his office.

Clasping and unclasping his fingers as though preying for patience, Oscar cleared his throat noisily in a vain bid to silence her.   Failing that, he raised his voice until it could be heard above Pat’s whining to say, “I’m afraid that I still don’t see what your problem is, Mrs. Marisse?”

“But he was stalking me, toying with me, getting ready to pounce….”

“You make it sound as though he were one of the big cats!” said Oscar with a sigh.   He had listened to an hour of her exploits each month for the last year and a half.