Arkin wakes up in the forest, only to find that his ignorant Private has stolen his survival tools and abandoned him.

“Private!” shouted Arkin. “PRIVATE!”

He rose to his feet, felt the lump on his forehead where the branch had hit him. “Goddamn it, Private, when I get a hold of you…!”

But Harrison was nowhere to be found. Upon further inspection of his own person, neither was his own rifle. Or his compass. Or his canteen. “PRIIIIIIIIVAAAAAATE!!!!!”

“Dat nen hideki!” Somebody shouted in Japanese.

Bordering on insanity, Arkin struggled to gather his thoughts for long enough to jump into a nearby bush. Not long later, a squad of four or five Japanese soldiers stomped through the underbrush, just before his hiding spot. 

They must have a compass among them, Sergeant Arkin thought. Quickly, before the Japs were out of sight, he leaped from the bush, quietly as he could manage, and crept up behind the last soldier in line. Discreetly placing his hand inside the enemy’s pocket, grabbed something circular and hard.

“Leng das dun po! Aida sikki lo peng…!” The Japs swiveled around and saw the Sergeant. 

Quickly, Arkin whipped his hand out from the soldier’s pocket and switched it to the enemy’s gun holster. He swiped the pistol from the Jap and, without hesitation, began unloading on everything in sight. Seven bullets and four dead hostiles later, the gun clicked empty.

But the fifth soldier now looked very angry. He raised his bayonet threateningly, glowering with excitement. Before Arkin could react, he heard the menacing call:

“BANZAI!” The cold blade sank deep into the Sergeant’s stomach. Very deep. So very deep, in fact, that the blade protruded out from Arkin’s lower back. As he dropped to his knees, the Jap withdrew his rifle from Arkin’s gut, and retrieved the empty handgun.

The Sergeant looked up and squealed, his eyes moist with pain. The surviving soldier returned to the Sergeant, took him by the chin, and glared deep into his eyes. “You are very in for it now,” he spoke, in broken English.

“N-61495, C-08923,” Arkin squeaked, clearly as he could muster.

“What?” replied the Japanese man, baffled.

“There’s a Private living at those coordinates.” Arkin winced, quickly adding as he lost his consciousness, “I want you to kill him.”

And Arkin closed his eyes.

Meanwhile, as Harrison pulled away the last vine restricting him from the clearing, he blinked. Confused, he checked the compass he’d stolen. This was certainly not the American base. Although he’d been going the right way, hadn’t he?

But one could tell, even from a distance, that the building before him was not empty. As a matter of fact, had anybody but Harrison seen the flag furling high above the barracks, they would recognize this military base as Japanese.

Since the Private didn’t, he shrugged. Maybe he’d ask for directions.

Click link for Chapter Four:

http://authspot.com/short-stories/man-up-day-u-s-a-chapter-four/

Click link for Chapter Two:

http://authspot.com/short-stories/man-up-day-u-s-a-chapter-two/

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  • addenfeld on Jan 13, 2010

    meh. not really as funny as the last one. but i guess that\’s cuz the private isn\’t really in this one

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