“No one could ever understand.” This is what I told myself as I lay awake on my bed one warm night.

My sister stirred beside me as she murmured something in her sleep. She always talks on her sleep. She even sings! But that doesn’t matter. I’m not in the mood to make fun of her tonight. Tonight, All I want to do is to think why they can’t understand me.

It’s Misa’s 13th birthday today. My lucky neice. My brother always throws a party for her. Can’t blame him, she’s the only child. Might as well spoil her right? Anyway, it’s a wonderful day this morning. Bright and sunny. Everyone’s busy of course. Cooking here, preparing there. I didn’t want to get in the way so I decided to go out with my friends for a little while. I’ll come back later when it’s already snack time or maybe a little bit more later.

Same old drinking sprees. I wonder what makes alcohol so addictive to us adolescents. I’m sure its not the taste, brandy is too bitter. Then suppose just its the trend. It’s just cool to drink, that’s all. Damn, I got a bit drunk. Time does fly so fast doesn’t it? I looked at my watch and saw that it’s already 6 pm. Oh-oh! The party! I forgot the party! But I didn’t want to leave my friends just like that either. The Idea came to me, I asked my friends to come along ao we can just continue drinking at the party. Anyway, i thought, it’s already drinking time for the adults. And everyone agreed.

We arrived at my brother’s place just in time for dinner. We approached my brother and he told us help ourselves out with the food. We went to the buffet table scooped a little bit of everything, then, we looked for a good spot to eat. A vacant table! Just perfect!

The food tasted great! Me and my friends were enjoying the food when we heard someone behind me said:

“And what kind of aunt would pick her good for nothing friend over her neice?”

Ah! Yes! My mom. Always ready to embarass me in front of my friends. She’s always like that. She always treat my friends like she knew them from head to toe and that she has all the right in the world to judge them.

“It doesn’t matter if I’m here or not. My presence is not important here anyway.” I reasoned out.

And that triggerred another arguement between me and my mother. We’re always like that. Always. And I knew that the longer our argument goes, the more nasty words she’s going to send out. She has this habit of judging people and making the people she dislikes feel disliked. That’s always the reason why we fight. I always try to tell her that she’s not perfect also and that she has no right to judge people and call them bitches, pimps, etc. I hate it when she judge people. I know we didn’t have to fight or argue, but its really getting in my nerves.

Well, thanks to her, dinner is ruined. I just told my friends that we should get out of there. We were on our way, but my mom stopped me telling everyone to stop me from leaving. I have o other choice but to let my friend go on without me. Everyone thinks that I’m just a kid and i don’t know my reasons. I know there’s no other choice but to obey for now.

And now, everyone’s asleep. I’m still awake thought. Thinking. Every adults think the same. They think that we teenagers don’t know what we are reasoning for. But I know exactly why I drifted away from mom. And there’s more to it that this day only. I tried to talk to her, write her a letter telling her what I feel, even. But each time that I tried to, she always says I’m dramatic. It isn’t bad to open up right? But why is she shutting me off? I’m only asking her one thing, listen. Just listen to me and open up her mind.

That is why no one will ever understand. Because no one dared to listen. If only she would listen. There’s a lot I want to get off my chest but I want my mom to listen.

It’s 3 am now. Gotta get some sleep. Another day tomorrow, but still no one will ever understand.