My Letter to You

 I know that I don’t know everything about you and it has been a very long time since we have dated, but I want you to know that my feelings for you run deep to the core of my soul, and I can’t even honestly say why.  It just happened to me.  It was that moment in time during the ending of 2001 and the beginning of 2002 when we dated between December/2001 and March/2002.  You made that impression on me and it stuck, and it will stick with me until the ending of time.  Only one other person has done that to me in my lifetime, but he would never be able to handle that forever kind of love that I possess.  So we just remained friends till this day, because he was man enough to tell me that he had the same feelings but he didn’t want to hurt me because he was not going to be able to give me all of him.  So I stepped back and decided to pray that if god ever sent me that person that could give me that forever kind of love then please let him feel and know that I also possess it and let him be strong enough to handle it. You see you really don’t know how deep my feelings are, because we haven’t had the time for me to show you in every way, how I can love you, but that will take a lifetime and I am willing and able to extend all of me to you forever.  You see I trust you with my life and if my life was ever taken from me in a foul way pertaining to you then I wouldn’t even care, because I live for you.  You make me feel sincere, grateful, warm, cuddly, sacred, and safe.  And whenever I think of you, I smile so hard that my jaw bones hurt, and that’s hard because I think of you every second of every minute in every hour of every day.    I also want you to know that I will do that forever.  Well here are several things I recollect about you.  You always speak what is on your mind.  You are a sincere person.  You love your mother to death.  You are a very caring person even though you don’t show it all the time.  You don’t like to argue.  You love to joke and laugh.  You have a very very strong brotherly kind of love.  You have not found that girl that possess the qualities you love in a women and can think similar to you as well as stay true to you and don’t cause any conflict between the relationship with the wrong feelings like being too demanding, clingy, controlling, and not trusting you with their feelings, if they only know that you don’t mind the clinginess if they could just control the other feelings, because you would not hurt them in any way or fashion.  I believe that you do have that forever kind of love because I have seen it in you, but it is your decision on who you want to give it to and to be honest I haven’t seen that kind of love in any man in the past.   I know that I possess some of those qualities, because if I didn’t you would not give me the time of day, but I will be honest with you I do need to work on some of my feelings when it comes to relationships, because I don’t want anything to go wrong.  I mean so wrong that we couldn’t work it out.  So if you feel that you can’t be that forever love to me and that we can’t concur the world together then all I ask is that you be the man that I know you are, and tell me face to face that you cannot, be that man, and I will step back once again, but I would want you to know that I will always possess those feelings for you till the end of time. © By Shannon Gaiter