A short detective story from San Francisco with a twist!

Old friends? we sure are!

The rain was particularly hard that September afternoon; as Thomas Shane held a news paper above his head and walked briskly to the ‘Green Turtle Bar’ the bar was on 5th street and not too far now. Tom mused to himself,   ‘So if my hunch is right this is set to be the worst drinking session of my overly long working life!’ Tom was wearing a cream coloured Trent coat and the damp collar was turned up trying to offer some protection from the howling wind and the torrential rain. Tom almost ran through the oak panelled car door and stood shaking himself like a Labrador.

Tom dumped the paper in the trash bin and set his wet coat on the wooden coat stand and sat heavily on a free stool at the bar. A slight bar man came over and slid a paper napkin in front of tom.

“What will it be stranger a double Vodka and lime with a twist of lime peel?”

Tom replied,

“Its nice to see you too big Stan! You still remember my drink after all these years? You must have an incredible memory Stan or I must have drunk shit loads of these that its burnt into your frontal lobe?”

Stan laughed as he poured a generous double vodka into the chunky glass tumbler. He leant forward and said,

“Tom I had to buy in extra bottles of Vodka for when you finished your shift at the precinct! How is private detective work suiting you? You must have been at it three years now?”

Tom replied,

“Its five years Stan the pay is great but the hours suck though. Have you seen big Ron? He is supposed to meet me here at 2.00pm I was five minutes late myself it must be the weather”

Stan replied,

“I ain’t seen him today Tom. To be honest he hardly drinks here now they made him chief of detectives he is a different guy you know? Kind of insular he scares me the way he looks at me sometimes! But he always was weird even when you two were partners”

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Comments (9)
  • roe hill on Jun 7, 2011

    Gritty and shocking story.

  • megamatt09 on Jun 7, 2011

    Story set a pretty good mood.

  • Prometheus Ridley Scott on Jun 7, 2011

    Get writing that novel, LB.

  • Bluemimosa on Jun 7, 2011

    Is it real story or just fiction?
    Well its amazing and the way you worded it is wonderful

  • pattiann on Jun 7, 2011

    Very good story

  • AngelaFaith on Jun 8, 2011

    INTERESTING reading!! For sure this would be the end to a very good book!!!

  • Sceptical Thinker on Jun 8, 2011

    Superb, short story build up of tension and twist at the end . I would have to agree with ‘Craigz’ get writing that novel.!

  • Inna Tysoe on Jun 11, 2011

    I agree. You should write a novel.

    Inna

  • Lord Banks on Aug 10, 2011

    Thank you for all your comments much appreciated. If you do like my work please feel free to download my new Book.

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B005GA9BRC

    Thank you Lord D.L. Banks

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