Re-Peat

(This story’s main character is a girl)

My life is a mystery to myself. I don’t know when it began, when it ever started, but I do know that there is something important that I have forgotten. Like a word on the tip of my tongue, it sits there, but I never reach it. I get ever so close, but in that same instant it disappears. Every time after I nearly touch the truth, I find myself in my bed as clueless as I was the day before, only to relive my dream over and over again. This is my dream. This is my life on repeat.

I wake up and indiscreetly pick up and put on some clothes scattered on the floor. While still in my half-awake stupor, I shift my body weight recklessly down the stairs, knocking into the railing and wall on multiple occasions. At the bottom, I turn to find myself staring into a dark room. This room is not the familiar breakfast table room it had once been for the lights are off and the sound of morning can not squeeze through the tightly closed windows. The clock reads 2:53, but there is no way it could be a minute past six. I blink twice and rub my eyes but the same image reappears shortly thereafter. I move slowly into the room and turn the lights on with anticipation, but the room remains dark. I walk around in the darkness, now very much awake, looking to make my way to my parents’ room. I raise my fist and knock quietly on the door. No response. I knock again, this time much louder, but still no reply. I open the door and into another sea of darkness I find myself staring into. I try to call out, but no sound can force its way out. I try again but to no avail. I walk toward the bed and as I get closer I feel more and more alone. When I finally reach the bed, I find that there is no one in it, and it is perfectly made. Now I feel very insecure. I run around from room to room to discover that the whole house is empty. No notes, no signs, no hints. I am all alone. I check the clock in my room to find that it is still 2:53. “What is going on?” is all that I can think. I sit on the living room couch and wonder what is happening. The front door opens and I quickly rush to my feet to confront the person who will most likely be one of my parents who can set things straight. I try to say hello, but once again, no sound is uttered. My parents walk in with no smiles on their faces as they stare blankly through me. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. Before I can do anything, my parents both hug as they comfort each other with the words “It’ll be all right”. I want to ask what will be all right, but I physically can’t. They walk a short distance away and escape into their room.

My head is nearly spinning as I try to think what could possibly be happening. All I can remember from yesterday is going to school and walking home. There is another knock on the door and my mother exits her room to answer it. I step back and out of the way as she drunkenly walks toward the door. My mother slowly opens the door to find one of my classmates standing on the front porch. This boy is none other than my one and only friend, Travis. He is perhaps the only person I have never seen sad. From the moment I met him, he has only been smiles and help to me, but the boy now standing in the doorway was not so familiar. He was staring down at his feet the whole time he was asking my mother a question that I could not hear. She answered with a yes as she herself returned to her room. The boy did not move an inch until my mother had closed her door. He stood there for a good minute before he finally moved. And when he did finally move, I saw the pain and anguish on his face when he finally lifted his head. He just stared blankly at me and then up the stairs toward my room. I walked up to him with eyes of disbelief, but when I had just about reached for his shoulder, he walked right through me. I could not believe what was now happening as he ascended the stairs behind me. I turned around to find him turning for my room at the top of the staircase . I ran up the stairs and he entered my room. When I made it into my doorway, I found him staring at my bed as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a necklace. It was the same necklace I had worn to school yesterday. A blur of a memory appeared in my head. The outline of someone’s familiar face. But just as quickly as I had found this memory, it was gone. Travis slowly lowered himself to his knees as a tear drop rolled down his cheek. At this point, my brain was at war to discover what was going on. Flashbacks suddenly came randomly and left just as quickly, over and over again. My head fell into complete chaos. He began “Why………God……….How can something like this ever have happened”. I grabbed my head in pain with two hands as a more lucid flashback jumped into my head. “God, are we all just toys in one of your games? I finally did it and this is how it turns out?!”. I fall to my hands and knees, still trying to relieve the pain in my head. I shut my eyes and the flashback of the day prior plays out almost flawlessly…..

I went to school like any other day, without a care in the world and with my head held high. I sat down in my regular seat and I turned to Travis who sat to my left and he smiled and I smiled back. He turned red and I did too, but that never happened before. We normally just smiled and started up a quick conversation, but today was different. Something felt strange in my stomach. Before I knew it, it was time for recess and I was quickly outside and soon found a spot on the bleachers. The boys always gathered up to play kick-ball and Travis was chosen somewhere in the middle of the line-up. I mean to say that he isn’t very good at kick-ball, but he nevertheless enjoys it. Before he came up to bat, he came over to me and said that he’d kick a home-run for me. I laughed and joked, “If you kick a home-run, I’ll give you my necklace!”. He smiled and blushed and then quickly ran over to the batter’s box. My stomach felt strange again, but this time the intensity was stronger. Travis never looked so intent on anything as he took his stance in the batter’s box. I suddenly wanted him to kick the home-run that would relinquish me of my necklace. He swung his foot back and wound up for the pitch. Everyone moved in toward home plate, but only seconds later did they discover that that was a bad decision. He booted the ball into the outfield where it bounced off the chain-link fence. He sprinted past first and started turning second as the outfielder threw it toward home. I couldn’t help but stand up as I watched the ball and Travis race for home plate. He bit down and dug deeper as he leaned forward and dove into home plate. He was safe. His teammates cheered with excitement and I just stared on in partial disbelief. I didn’t realize it, but I had been tugging at my necklace the whole time. He walked over to me with his dirt stained shirt and said,”When I make a promise, I keep it”. I smiled back and handed him the necklace. He reached for the necklace, but instead grabbed both my hand and necklace. I immediately blushed and before I could ask what he was doing, he asked me out. That feeling in my stomach came back, stronger than the previous two times combined, as I began stuttering “I” over and over again. I regained my composure and finally said yes. We both couldn’t have smiled any wider than we both did at that moment.

The rest of the day, I continued to feel strange. The feeling in my stomach returned but this time it felt like it fit. I was overly excited for the rest of the day as the news permeated throughout the grade. I blushed every time someone asked me about what happened and every time I told them, I was just as proud as the next. When the final bell rang, I collected my books and closed my locker. Travis and I always walk home together and this time was no exception. I couldn’t help but be a little fidgety collecting my things. He came up to me and asked while looking away,” Can….I carry your books for you?”. I saw his crimson red face and smiled back as he nervously took them from me. We could both feel the tension between each other even though we had been such good friends for so long. The first few blocks we walked were awkward to say the least, but we eventually got to talking. He broke the silence by saying that he really didn’t think he was going to kick that home-run today. I told him that I actually was rooting for him even though I knew I’d lose my necklace. He then stopped walking and reached into his pocket and pulled it out. “I don’t really have a need for this necklace, so instead, I’m going to trade it back to you.” I really wanted my necklace back and I figured I’d play along. “OK then, what do I have to do?”. He raised his head and with intense eyes he said,”I’ll trade it back to you for a kiss”. Now, I hadn’t kissed any boy before seeing as Travis was my only real friend, and I had wondered many times when I would actually give my first kiss. It’s not that I’m ugly, it’s just that many people don’t understand me like Travis does. I really thought about it and he broke the silence again. “I will give you until tomorrow to think about it. Otherwise, this will be mine forever.” as he shoved the necklace back into his pocket. He turned the corner and waved good-bye as I remained in the trance his offer had left me in. I began walking in the other direction, wondering over and over what I should do. For some reason, this had escalated into some big tornado of a problem. I started crossing the street, not looking anywhere but straight ahead with blank eyes while I drifted into my thoughts. My dream ends there.

I am able to open one eye shortly after my revelation as I force my twitching neck to point my head toward Travis. He then leans onto my bed where he begins openly sobbing, burying his face into the bed spread, slamming his fist into the mattress. The seizure suddenly stops as I lie there motionless. The final part of my dream then reveals itself to me.

I was crossing the street when a car slammed on the breaks and I turned my head. I could not snap out of my daze fast enough and instead found myself thirty feet away lying lifelessly in the street.
But then this whole day stops and again I find myself waking up in a cold sweat, reliving the day, forever living the same nightmare on repeat.

Explanation: I am in a coma, and I have an out of body experience where I can somehow see everything that happened the following day when my parents come home. Travis comes to my house and into my room where we often played together only to wonder why when he finally had the guts to do something about us, did something so terrible happen. He watches over me every day in the hospital, completely unaware that I am forever reliving the pain of the people most affected by the tragedy of my condition. The time of the clock in the beginning is when my time stops/ I get hit. I relive the same day over and over because I am in a comatose body, unaware that I have become comatose. As a result, my brain fights to remember, but when it finally comes to the conclusion, it replays the dream. It may be that something had been altered in the brain by the accident, or you can come up with your own conclusion.