After that day with Bandit, my life seemed to be in a haze. Yet as a young child I merely locked that day away in my memory and went about everyday. I was still living and laughing everyday. But that nightmare with Bandit was only the first of many nightmares to come and every single one just got worse and worse.

He was pulling one sword from its scabbard and looking at it. When he looked up to see me, he glared at me. He started telling me, in a very cold voice that i had never heard come from him before, that my mom had left. She had simply walked out on us. I know that he was trying to make her out to be the bad guy but he didn’t seem to realize that i had witnessed and heard several of the arguments HE would always start. I knew deep down my mom wouldn’t do such a thing. However, to this day, I don’t understand why she didn’t take us with her. But once again, I am digressing.

He went into the hall way down to his room with his sword in hand. I was frightened. Honestly, trully scared of what he might do. You see, ever since he had quit he would also hit me. I grabbed the phone and started dialing my Uncle Ed’s number but at that moment he came back into the living room and swung his sword catching the telephone cord with it stopping me cold. I froze and let the phone drop. He growled something at me about calling the police but i was much to scared to answer. I went back to my brother’s room to check on him. When I headed back to the living room I was stopped dead in my tracks.

My father was now on the telephone and playing with his rifle. He was sitting on the couch opposite the hallway. When he saw me he pointed the rifle at me and having been taught what guns could do fear gripped every bone in my body. I moved to the side out of his view and prayed that i would be okay. When i stepped back out he pointed the rifle at me again. Again i moved to the side, when i stepped back out two more times he was still pointing the gun at me. I then moved to the side and silently made my way to my brother’s room where i laid down protectively by my brother and eventually fell asleep.

I awoke to my father’s voice telling me to wake up and that my mom still hadn’t come home yet. I followed him slowly into the living room where he had yet another drink and his guns in pieces on the floor in front of the couch. He told me that my mom had left and that i could leave too. i took that as not an invitation but an order as well as an opportunity to get to my brother. Walking back to my room i got dressed quickly and went to my little brother’s room where he was playing contently with his toys. I packed up his diaper bag with diapers, wipes, baby powder. I told him we were going to see mommy and his eyes lit up like Christmas lights. I told him to stay in the bed room while i went to make him a bottle. After messing around the kitchen for a few minutes i got him dressed and put his shoes on. Mind you, I was only ten and a half at this time and i already knew how to take of my little brother. Grabbing a few of his toys, i finished up packing his diaper bag and i zipped it shut and threw it over my shoulder. “Come on, we’re going to go see mommy,” i said and we made it to the door before my father, still sitting drunk on the couch spoke up.

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  • Patricia Oshier Bruening on Sep 16, 2009

    I had no idea this happened after I stormed out that night. I\’ll be reading more of your articles , finding out the things I don\’t remember. I was so ticked at him by the time I got to the end I could only think, \”if he crosses my path again, I\’ll killhim.\”

    Sounds like you\’re dealing with it all pretty well, though. I don\’t remember the fight part of this but I probably will when my mind is ready to handle it. Well done, and I so wish none of this had happened–but hindsight is always 20/20. What matters is what we do now. You are the strongest person I know and I can\’t take credit for that. YOu\’ve done well in spite of m e. Now, off to do errands.



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