I always wondered if I was an after-thought with Ejike. That, up against Amoge, i was the woman he would rather marry. Did he wake up one morning he proposed with the itch, ‘hmmm, why not marry Trinity instead’? It was the Christmas after the one that he showed up with Amoge. Could he have decided that a poorly-planned and executed proposal would erase the unpleasant memory of the past. His sister, Ifeatu, wasn’t impressed too. And she wasn’t even there when the whole Amoge thing went down. She just knew that there were a better way to ask a woman to marry you than saying it in the same sentence as an announcement that you were tired of your “penny-penny” job and believed a UK Masters was the way to go.

“Mom, Manchester has the best business school the world over. It’s not about money, it’s about value! And what I’m really asking for is a loan. A low interest rate loan, to pay up in five years. I need time to save enough money to give Trinity the wedding of her dreams,” was how he put it, patting my hand as he spoke with immense pride.

As though on cue, Mummy Rose, Ifeatu and I paused on chewing our breakfast. Next, Mummy Rose took a sip of her water, Ifeatu gasped at Ejike, and I stared blankly at the tablecloth.

“Ejike dear, do stick to one subject, so you don’t get us all confused here,” Ifeatu sarcastically advised.

“Ify don’t be rude to your brother,” Mummy Rose cautioned. “So, Ejike, you want me to give you how much?”

“I’d need approximately £10,000, all expenses included,” he breezily replied, frowning at Ifeatu.

Mummy Rose exclaimed, “What does that mean, all expenses included? Young man, i hope you know you are not a toddler anymore. You cannot be talking about marriage – whether you be serious or not, i don’t know – while still expecting your mother to support you. Please, find out how much the school fees is and tell me. That’s all the money I’m prepared to give you. It’s a loan you asked for, it’s a loan you’ll get. I expect my refund in five years. Imagine! All expenses included!”

“Yes, mom,” he muttered. When we all resumed eating, he got his voice back and decided Mummy Rose needed clarifying about that tinny bit comment she made, “Mom, I’m serious about the wedding thing. Teeny?”

This time, Ifeatu dropped her cutlery. “Gee, brother! They give awards for this sort of proposal!”

I burst out laughing, because Ifeatu knew how to do satires. And because she took the words right out of my mouth, but said it better.

Ejike wasn’t amused. “Someone isn’t minding her business.”

“Oh, forgive me. My breakfast generally doesn’t go well with most things. But, I shall try harder,” was Ifeatu’s mischievous reply. Not wanting to offend Ejike, I began chuckling this time until I realised IIfeatu didn’t share my humour. “Especially since I can see the gal I’m ‘defending her honour’ appears not to mind at all.”

But I minded very much. I couldn’t quite shake the thought that Ejike was only aiming to get me to forgive him for Amoge. If an engagement was what it’d take to speed the forgetting process, then he would take that road, which was really all nonsense! I wished I could tell him that. We haven’t really discussed his infidelity. The day he came to my classroom the afternoon to beg for reconciliation, the same day that he inferred that I had driven him away, was when he gave me few tidbits about his relationship with Amoge. About her being young, and her demands. I hadn’t asked to know, but it helped my ego to hear those. That was two months ago, and it was the last time we spoke of her. Yet, she is never out of my thoughts. Everything Ejike did revolve around her, everything. If he smiled, it could be that he was thinking of her. If he was on the phone, I snooped his handset the first chance i got to determine if she was the one he had been speaking with. The Saturday he promised he’d come down to Enugu to spend time with me but didn’t, I distressed myself the entire weekend imagining he was with her. I never told Ejike of those fears. Some things were better left unsaid. We were still very much threading on fragile grounds. A little pressure, and it’d all cave in.

“Are you ok?” Ejike asked, interrupting my reverie.

I was in the guest room where I sleep whenever I visited. Ejike’s bedroom was still at back at the boys-quarters, to keep us from desecrating Mummy Rose’s home. Although recently, she had loosen up on her surveillance that we could go in and out of each other’s room at will, so long as the door wasn’t shut. Could it also be that Ejike wanted the “no sleep-overs” restrictions dropped altogether? Was why the proposal or whatever that was that he did over breakfast?

“Yes, I’m fine thank you.” I made room for him to sit on the bed, wearing on a cheerful face.

“You are upset?” He was cuddling me now, caressing my hands again.

“No.” It wasn’t a lie, I wasn’t upset with him. I didn’t quite know what emotion it was that I felt at the moment. So, I changed the subject. “We used to live in Manchester, you know?”

“For real? Wow. I always think London when I associate you with living in UK.”

“Nah. It’s Manchester. First it was Leeds though. But I don’t remember Leeds much, cos I was two when we moved. That’s when dad joined the Army. He didn’t like it being a civilian lawyer very much. That’s why he went into the military, where he didn’t have to chase around for clients. Dad’s other sister lives in London though, and i have a granny there too.”

“Your dad’s mom lives in London?” Perplexed, He asked. While we were both in school, I had taken him to visit my paternal grandmother in our village. I suppose he was confusing one granny with another.

“No! Not that one. My mom’s mom! She’s the one who lives in London. But we never went to her home. She came to Manchester maybe twice or thereabout. I remember she hated traveling. Then again, she and mom were like night and day. I can’t quite recall why now. My dad’s mom has always lived in Nigeria as far as I know. Years before marrying granddad, I was told.”

“But, she’s English?”

“Yes, by birth, but her parents are Brazilians. Guess I’m as mixed race as they come.” Apparently, having one’s hair stroked also loosens the mouth.

In principle, I don’t talk about my family, beyond the ones I now have. Bringing up the past made me want to dwell on what could have been if my parents hadn’t split, and on the sister I had lost. I was done with those. God knows I did enough of that growing up. All for what? Things happen, and one has to move on right? But it’s been sixteen years! Exactly how long can one be kept away from their own mother?

“Do I want me to look for them when I go to Manchester,” Ejike asked, picking up on my mood. Generally, he didn’t press me for information about Mom or Phina. What bit I volunteered, he accepted and asked no questions.

“No.” I pushed back my tears. “I’ll do that myself, the moment I’m financially independent from dad. Right now, let’s talk about something else: like your going away.”

“Ok. You don’t want me to go? Are you worried that it’d be the end of us if I did?”

“It wouldn’t be the first time.” I blurted out, annoyed to be reminded of Amoge.

“Not this time, Teeny. Why do you think I’d want us to get committed? I want to leave knowing that you’d be there when I come back.”

“I’ve always been here, Ejike. It’s you I’m not sure of. You will be gone for at least one year. Am i to believe that you won’t be having sex for a whole year and more?”

“Of course,” he exclaimed, sounding very sincere and convincing. “Aw, Teeny. Why won’t I keep myself for you? Unless you are telling me that you won’t.”

“Women are different. We are faithful beings”

“Yeah right!” Scoffed Ejike. At that moment, Ifeatu peeped into the room from the door. He turned at her, “Yes, madam? Can we help you?”

But she stuck out her tongue at him, before turning her attention to me. “Your dad calls.”

“Dad! Hmmm, strange.”

Mummy Rose was chatting with him when I came into the sitting room. When she saw me, she quickly bade her welfare and handed the receiver to me.

“Good morning, sir,” I mumbled into the mouthpiece, still doubtful that it was my dad.

“Good morning, dear.” It was him all right. He hadn’t lost his accent or the you-would-be-sorry-if-you-mess-with-me command in his voice that frightened the bejesus out of me as a kid. “Sincerest apologies to interrupt your holidays. Something came up and I need you down here ASAP. See if you can find a flight to bring you to Owerri for either this evening or first thing tomorrow morning. Call me when you confirm the time and I’ll be at the airport to pick you.”

“Ok, sir. Is it ok if I send you a text instead?”

“Why sure, so long as you get back to me. It’s of essence. That’s it then, enjoy your day.”

The thing that came up was Phina. She was with him at the airport.