If there was anything Jeff knew about being a gentleman, it had to be the moustache. Did the author Charles Dickens who so desperately wanted to be seen as a gentleman not don a mustache himself? Or did modern day actor Tom Selleck not seem quite the dashing gentleman with his infamous moustache? When Sarah had dumped Jeff, she had stated that he was a far cry from the Victorian gentlemen she had read about in her favorite novels. It was said-according to Sarah-that he was an uncaring cad and that he could learn a thing or two from the humble men from an era long past. And the first thing he thought of was to grow a moustache. It seemed like the perfect way to win her back-forget the changing of his ways– No, what would fix everything was the growing of some upper lip hair. The Victorian gentleman was educated, his mind brimming with intelligence. Jeff was not.

He began his journey into gentlemanhood with the simple click of the finger. The internet. Ignoring the in-depth analysis of what constituted as a gentleman, he simply browsed through thousands of images of antique pictures of men sporting a monocle over one eye and a top hat. With these images, he began taking notes. After about an hour of surfing the web, he was done. It was time to begin his unstoppable plan to win Sarah back. If it was a gentleman that she wanted, it was a gentleman she would get. First things first, he had to grow his moustache. It took quite awhile, but when it finally grew in, it was a moustache worth keeping. Secondly, he needed new threads. No gentleman would be caught dead wearing jeans and an old shirt. With the help of the internet, he special ordered a pair of custom gentleman clothes. Several days later came a box packaged with a black tailcoat, a white vest, and a matching cravat. Adding the final touches, Jeff soon left his house accessorized with a monocle and a top hat.

This was it. There was no doubt in his mind that Sarah would be begging for him to take her back. He rang the door. No one came. He rang the door once again. Still there was no answer. Beginning to feel quite peeved, he rang the doorbell endlessly. Finally the door swung open.
“Why hello. Notice anything different about me?” he smugly asked, striking a pose.
“What the hell are you wearing?”
“Can’t you tell? I’m the gentleman you wanted me to be now.”
“Seriously? You have got to be kidding me.” Sarah muttered to herself, shaking her head in disbelief. “Being a gentleman has nothing to do with appearance. Now go home before you make an even bigger ass of yourself.” And with that said, she slammed the door shut. Jeff stood at her front door, taken aback.
“I must have the wrong moustache…” he thought to himself.