Everything was in order. The employees had been hired and everyone was wearing the new company Tee shirts. Ribbons and balloons hung from the ceiling as my family and friends arrived. The live remote radio station vehicle was parked in front as the pizzas and donuts were delivered. For you see, today was the grand opening of Appearance, the Ultimate Salon.

In June 1994 I decided to try and have some fun. I opened a full service hair, nail, massage, facial, make-up and tanning salon. It was in an area I was hopeful would see a rebirth in business. Everything was new for the salon and I felt it was a win, win with a full glass front, located right on Main Street. We offered complimentary coffee, tea or wine to the patrons and I thought we were light years ahead of the competition.

The grand opening was a disaster. The radio station was broadcasting our location and services and mentioned the free food. Within minutes a line of people started to enter as they headed at record speed for the pizza and donuts, not even noticing my beautiful establishment. Apparently a group home for mentally challenged adults was around the corner and it didn’t take long for the news to spread. I didn’t have the heart to tell them one slice or one donut as they huddled around the food like football players until it was all devoured.

I had a massage therapist who worked by appointment only. The majority of his clients were professional and would come in for late evening treatments. I had set up a small private room in the back for the therapist to ply his trade. Without warning, the therapist showed up one day and removed his equipment and told me he was moving on to do other things. The next day I became acutely aware what those things were. My therapist was arrested for having a methamphetamine lab. I was floored. Actually, in 1994 I didn’t even know what it was, but I knew it was bad.

One exceptionally hot summer day a man came in and asked me if we did waxing. He was one of the hairiest guys I have ever seen. He was wearing a sleeveless Tee shirt and hair was erupting out of every opening.  I asked what he wanted waxed and when he said his back hair we all almost gagged. There wasn’t enough paraffin in the state to cover that man.

I had two rooms with two tanning beds. Personally, I would never get into one of these contraptions, but my customers loved them. On some days those beds would run from 7:00 A.M. until 11:00 P.M. and although they brought in a lot of money, they also caused excessive headaches. The bulbs are expensive and the Plexiglas was even more costly. I arrived at the salon one day and noticed two women exiting the same tanning room. The women that worked for me knew about the one woman in the bed. They didn’t notice the other woman sneak in as well. Let’s put it this way….tanning beds are meant for the weight of one person and not two. The glass was cracked and broken and the rest is up to your own interruption.

For some strange reason people frown upon entering a business with hookers out front. Who would have known?ha Right! Finally, I had enough when I saw the one girl hanging out in my parking lot. I went outside, got in my car and opened the passenger side door. My employees were all standing in the front window with puzzled and bewildered looks on their faces as I drove off with the hooker. “Do you drink coffee?” I asked. “Yes” was the response. I drove to McDonald’s, ordered a cup at the drive-thru window, asked the hooker where she wanted to be dropped off and gave her a stern warning. I clearly said that this was the only money she would ever see from me and if I ever saw her again in front of my shop I would have her arrested. From that day on this young, lost soul would walk as far as the corner and no further.

It is nice to have fun and I’ll be the first to admit I’ve had my fair share. However, after a couple of fun filled years I closed up shop. It is now a car supply and detailing business that can handle hairy men and “pimp my ride” cars.

Written by: Dennis L. Page

http://nononeocon@blogspot.com