“Joe! Joe, turn that damn light off!”

“I can’t! I don’t know how to turn it off!”

“Joe, turn it off! I’m trying to sleep!”

“I told you, Larry, I don’t know how!”

Howdy, I’m Joe. I’m 23 years old and I have this internal glow. It’s really bright, and it bothers people sometimes.

“Turn it off! I hate you, Joe! I HATE YOU!” Larry head-butted me in the chest.

“OW! Larry, why did you do that?”

“Shut up! AAH, turn that damn light off!” He head-butted me again.

Larry has been my best friend since we were three.

“If you don’t turn that light off, I swear to God, I’ll kill you!” He took a couple of steps back to get a running start, and charged me.

BAM! I was hit square in the chest and the light went off.

“Ah, finally.” Larry fell straight over and went to sleep almost instantly. I lied down in my bed, but I couldn’t sleep. I can’t sleep without my light.

After a few minutes of stirring, my light turned back on. I was starting to doze off when I heard a noise.

“JOE!” I looked over to see Larry running at me. He jumped into the air and made a cannonball, like you’d do into a pool, and landed on my stomach. The light turned back off.

Ten hours passed. Larry got out of his bed and flicked a light switch. He looked over to see me wide awake.

“You sure do wake up fast, boy.”

“I never went to sleep.”

“Hey, Joe, guess what.”

“What, Larry?”

“I’M BATMAN!” Larry ran across the room and tried to do a cartwheel but fell and landed on his neck.

“Yeah, right, Larry. I’m Batman.” I jumped out the window and landed on some kid. The kid wasn’t breathing but I didn’t care. I was Batman.

“Joe! That was awesome!”

“Yeah, I totally squashed this kid.”

“Yeah… hey… wait. I TOLD YOU LAST NIGHT TO TURN THAT LIGHT OFF!” My light must have come back on when I landed.

“Sorry, Lar-“ I looked up to see Larry plummeting the full 10 stories toward me.

“I’m Spiderman!” he cried in glee.