A novela I wrote, not much to day about it really.
They’re not selfish; I do them for others-
Do you? Aren’t all of these done for you in some way? You’re kind to others because it avoids conflict; you help others because your bible says you must –
That’s not true!
Yes it is. You do your homework because it’s expected of you and you listen to your parents so they think better of you. You don’t love your family or your friends you just love what they can offer and what they make you feel. And the only reason you go to church and prey is because you’re terrified for your eternal soul.
I’m not. You’re a terrible person.
A moment of silence passed, and then the cynic voice chimed in:
Do you believe you love Lucas?
But you let him die.
I didn’t mean to, it was an accident.
Why did you not save him? Why will you not save him?
Kisara paused for a long moment. Her mind played out scenarios of what could happen if she dared go in search of his soul. None of the possibilities were good.
Are you really that selfish that you won’t even try?
The voice was jeering, tormenting, ridiculing. She hated it.
Mostly because it was right.
In retrospect, the chances of Lucas actually surviving a blade in the chest were slim to none however at that time Kisara wasn’t thinking logically, all she knew was that he was out in the depth of nowhere and she had to help him.
Because she was a good person, if she wasn’t how could she ever have warranted the love of someone like him?
With only that thought cascading through her throbbing head she set off, away from the desert towards the looming grey ocean. She exited the fiery red of the desert and was faced with the oppressive onslaught of grey that was the beach. It was cold.
She stumbled to the grey water and paused before it. Hesitantly she stepped into it, it felt like ice. It sent shivers up her spine and down her bare legs, never before had Kisara experienced such blistering cold.
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