I wrote this for English class. I guess it’s pretty intense! I hope you enjoy!

The second night was just as uncomfortable as the first. Cold and never-ending might describe it perfectly. Brandon was so excited to go see Mr. Starkey today. He was awake almost all night.

“Excuse me! Is anyone there?” Brandon banged on the door again.

“What do ya’ want this time?” the same man from the day before asked, irritated.

“I am leaving today!”

“No you’re not! You can’t leave until we find you foster parents.”

“Mr. Richard Starkey is taking me to find some today.”

“Really? Richard Starkey? Wow. He’s real important, ya’ know.”

“I know. So am I allowed to go?”

“Why a’ course you are! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for me to introduce myself before you leave. Maybe I can get that promotion after all.”

Brandon was annoyed that the officer was using him in a way to progress in his job, but thrilled he was able to go with him.

The new clock that the nice officer got Brandon struck ten o’clock. Someone knocked hard on the steel door. Brandon hoped He had looked nice enough to go meet a bunch of new people. They had given him a new jacket to cover up the shirt he had been wearing the entire time he was there. Someone knocked again; it was the rude guy. Brandon ran up to the door and it shrieked open. There he was. Mr. Starkey was sitting in the waiting room and smiled when he saw Brandon step out of the dim room.

“You look very nice Brandon.” He said politely as Brandon neared him.

“Thank you.”

“So, are you ready to go find some new parental figures?” he asked, repeating the word “so”.

“I sure am, sir!” Brandon replied, hoping he didn’t sound too eager.

They exited the police station and got into Mr. Starkey’s car. This time, Brandon got to sit in the front. It was exhilarating. Brandon’s father had never let him sit in the front before.

“So what have you bean up to?” Mr. Starkey asked.

“Just sitting inside a sinister room all alone.”

“Aw, poor little guy. You’ll be outta’ there in no time at all!”

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Comments (9)
  • Chelsea :) on May 4, 2009

    Hey girrl! This is such a great story! It should be a new book!

  • Ashley Hyland on May 4, 2009

    This is a very good and suspenseful story. You should consider sending it to a company to make it a book. Maybe you will actually get paid! It is a unique thriller that I’m sure no one has ever really thought of. God luck on future work.
    -Ashley

  • Ashley Hyland on May 4, 2009

    This is a very good and suspenseful story. You should consider sending it to a company to make it a book. Maybe you will actually get paid! It is a unique thriller that I’m sure no one has ever really thought of. God luck on future work.
    -Ashley

  • Joey on May 7, 2009

    This is a very good story. I hope you go far in the writing world.

  • Medium-Sized Billy on May 8, 2009

    This took a while to read, but if you commit, you’ll get really into it like I did. Simply marvelous!

  • Bill on May 11, 2009

    I have never read a story like this. Is it based off of that kid who killed his father and his father’s friend? Oh well, it’s one tof the best stories I’ve ever read.

  • Mini-McCleney on May 14, 2009

    I love chicken nuggets… but this is good too.
    Do you think pregnant ladies are sexy? I do. It’s too bad that mom died, especially if she was pregnant when she died…
    I have to go get a towel for my peerspiration issues.
    I’M SWEATING UP A STORM!

  • John L. on Jun 8, 2009

    WOW! What a bad little boy! I read your poem “An Ode to Friendship” and they are both so great. I would print this out and give it to my friends like I did with your poem, but I don’t think I have enough paper. Well, continue your career in writing and you would be a great author!
    -John

  • davchild on Sep 24, 2009

    Talk about suspenseful! This is amazing.

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