So where do academic qualifications fall in with the smart arse era? In our minefield of education degree courses are available in just about anything and are more and more becoming a must. It’s interesting to note the number of street sweepers, shelf packers in supermarkets and pizza delivery persons who have degrees, and draw solstice from the fact that they are smarter than the people who look down on them. I’ve often amused myself by looking at the employment section of the local and national papers, and have chortled with mirth at some of the ads. For example, Fish Fryer required, GCSE English language essential. What if you have 20 years experience and no GCSE’S? Don’t apply because you can’t converse with fish. Do we even know if fish can speak English? Public Toilet Attendant required, must have a minimum of two years cleaning experience and a working knowledge of chemicals. Do housewife and mother count as criteria? Or do you need a PhD in chemistry to stick bleach down a bog? Maybe a degree in engineering would help with manipulation of the bog brush. Who said you can’t get a job because you over qualified? In the age of the smart-arse what becomes of the poor misfits of society with no degree? Well, don’t loose hope. Have you got a good appearance, own car and outgoing personality? Then you can earn a substantial salary as a debt collector in North and West Belfast. I wonder how long you could maintain your car and good appearance if you took this job.

So what hope is there for those who simply can’t fit the smart arse mould? How do qualities like loyal, dependable, genuine, sincere, hard working, or creative and sociable compare with academic or game show success? Has our modern society placed so much emphasis on intelligence, so called or otherwise, that equally desirable assets have been obscured even to the point of oblivion, and those who possess these qualities are held in lower esteem than those with higher intelligence who don’t possess them? If you can add loving and caring to the above list, then send your CV to me, for the post of friend.