It hit my father hard, so he used coke and alcohol to sooth his problems — even slapping around my mother and I helped make him feel better. Very soon after my uncle’s death, I tried weed and booze. How did a grade 6 kid get a hold of this stuff? Well, I just asked. So after picking up some “goodies”, my cousin and I had a few beers and joints but she hallucinated and happened to phone the police.

In the same evening, I got word about my other family members who got into a fight and one’s throat was slit. It was my first time using drugs and alcohol and I was entertained by the adrenaline. So I did it more often. Junior high was riddled with social, financial and family problems. High school started and I had to live in a one bedroom apt with my very ill mother and with a father who walked out to further his life.

It hurt me emotionally to the point where I began stealing hundreds — maybe even thousands — of dollars. I stole medications like percocet,oxycotin and also muscle relaxants. I took about 15 pills a night while smoking a J and having a few brews — that was my ultimate fav. Getting into MDMA and X was not so good though. I tried to commit suicide by overdosing, but it didnt work. Luckily, my friend of 13 years woke me up.

With family members that use heroin and crack, coke doesn’t bother me, but the fact that I quit school and quit my fav hobbie playing hockey really bothers me. Being a 17-year-old native in Canada is like being a black person living in a racist community where criticism is an everyday occurrance. Trying a different path than my family, I want to go back to school and graduate instead of going to jail.

But I’m still addicted and finding help is my problem. So I’ll light up a J for those people who find it hard to get help!