So, I am driving along, completely minding my own business on my way to my massage appointment, when, out of the clear blue sky flies a giant alien-esque beetle-bug.  It lands just inches below my slightly open window, lucky for me, and not inside my car. All of this I see, out of the corner of my eye, at first, as its shadow crosses the sun, dancing into my line of vision. Only then did I peer to the left to find him just sitting on the pane, as I sit in my car, now waiting at a red light.

We stare each other down immediately, trying to bait each other, like in a wild west shootout, testing each other’s nerves to see who would give in first. That little bastard gets me, and I flinch, rolling my window up all the way. The thought of him crawling inside my car for a ride is just too much to bear. I watch him move with the window, his steely, beady little eyes looking almost through me in some sort of satisfied way that only an alien-beetle can.

One point for beetle, zero for me.

Now, I have never been one to pick up hitch-hikers. No way, not me. My mother taught me better than that. Plus, I’ve seen all those movies where a girl is riding along, minding her own business, when she foolishly picks up some n’er-do-well on the side of the street. Sure, he looks innocent enough, actually, she thinks, he’s a bit attractive, so she lets him in. And that’s when all hell breaks loose! Oh yes, I have seen those horror films!

So, as you can imagine, I am pretty perturbed at this point. I mean, who wouldn’t be? This little bugger jumps on, uninvited, not bothering to ask me if it’s okay, or which way I am headed, or at the very least if he can offer some gas money! But nonetheless, he holds on, just staring me down. I honestly don’t even think he blinks. Oh yeah, he’s good.

But then I think to myself, is he that good? Don’t I have a trick or two up my sleeve? Would I really be able to relax at my massage appointment knowing that this little alien-bug got the best of me? Hell no!