Right now, I am sitting in a bistro,on the corner of the street, and nothing less then 16 gorgeous women stare at my ass. I have my laptop out, and while they stare, I post the pictures online, in an attempt to find out who they really are. I see a young novice of the geek culture, who tries to approach a gorgeous group of ladies. I watch how he insecurely stumbles, and comes back. I stop the young grasshopper, and invite him for a mountain dew on my side.

„What is it you was trying to do?“, I ask him, and grin at him.

The novice sighs, and stares down on his Metallica shirt.

„I came to seek the company of the beautiful women in the corner.“

I sigh, and bow over to him…..

„You noticed that the group is mainly composed of…. females who prefer females?“

The novice looks, and shakes his head.

„Well, to recognize that, you need to be more advanced in the ways of geekdom. Now, there in the corner sit four beautiful women. Do not do anything yet, but instead tell me what you would do.“

The novice says:

„I will go up to them, and use a pickup line.“

I look at him, and ask:

„Dear me, you got more then one? How about you give me your best try?“

He nods, and gets out a printout-list, here some of them were already crossed out.

„Ahem, how about this… I have the mind of Arnold Schwarzenegger and the body of Mahatma Gandhi?“

„So, not bad, but one of them wears the Indian flag, so she could be offended…“

I shake my head, heavy of worries, and write one of my less powerful pickup lines down.

„You think that will work? It is just…“

I hold the novices shoulder.

„Dear novice, this line is everything you should ever use in a case like this. Trust me, it will work.“

The novice goes over to the girls, who giggle at first, and uses my pickup-line. The girls giggle, and soon, after a lengthy sit down at their table, one girl, the Californian surfer-type with a very heavy focus on two wonderful….. social attributes (Charisma and Social, of course, both at least 18), grabs the lucky geek at his hand, and drags him to a more secluded place.

„Excuse me,“ , says a nice young fellow, who seems to be of the goth way of life, „What pickup-line did you advise him to?“

I show it to him, and he gasps for air.

„But… „I may not look like it, but I can configure your Macbook pro so it gets free wireless Lan? How did you… why did it?“

I shake my head, and turn the laptop around. The actual network analysis of the wireless Lan access point is on the screen. Apparently,someone decided that the name of the Bistro would make a good password for the superuser account.

„They were into it, and apparently someone must have kicked them out…. sad thing, that.“

The goth just slips out of his apathy for a millisecond, enough to allow the impression that he would be smiling, before his mouth presses again together its grief ridden lips.

I grin, and stir my mountain dew, while I try to guess under which of the security cameras of the bistro the two sit. Not as if something would happen now. But with us geeks, it is often possible that we behave exactly the way the woman wants. Who knows, maybe she would phone him again? For example, if in…. I look at my watch….. 2 days, 3 hours and 23 minutes a virus would temporarily disable the computer. I grin, and lean back. Naughty me…..