Interviewer: So Dover. I understand you’ve built up a bit of a “bad” reputation in the Quote Book.

Dover: Hey now. It’s not my fault people do not understand my sophisticated language.

I: Now, this may be true, but how about your comment, “I like spreading out my legs,”? Can you defend this?

D: (Dover’s eyes widen as she glances left and right) Umm… Well… You see, it was a long day and I needed a breeze!

I: I see. I understand you have a special relationship with a Mr. Jake Russell [quoted as Junior]. Care to explain why you quote, “would love to screw with Jake,”?

D: Ah. I remember that day well. It was a couple of days after my advance to the Nerd Herd table. I had sat down before Jake had come over, and somebody asked if we should sit in different seats. I gladly accepted by replying, “I would love to screw with Jake.” (Now this was in the sense of playing a good humored joke on the boy).

I: Right. Were any of your other quotes mistakenly assumed to be dirty?

D: YES. Too many to count, I might add. For instance, “My hips make boys speak Mexican,” was interpreted very inappropriately.

I: Care to expand on that?

D: Well, it was all in jest. I was simply making fun of Shakira and her horrendous lyrics to one of her most famous songs. That was ALL.

I: If you say so, Dover. Now back to Jake; the Quote Book holds evidence that he may have returned some of your alleged feelings. It was noted that he wanted to “gum” your “muffin”. Is this true?

D: No. It is not. He wanted to gum his muffin which in all reality was mine. That quote has been so screwed wi-… played wi- … messed wi-… I would have to refute that quote. Next question, please.

I: Do you still stand by your statement, “I’m quite clean, actually,”?

D: Yes. I will always be clean. Language-wise. And other aspects I will not mention.

I: You’re a good girl, Dover. Any final comments?

D: More of a gentle command: Stop over-reacting to my pronouns, people! Thank you for having me, Sara.

That wraps up another interview! Remember to check my profile, (by clicking on my name up at the top), for more updates from The Quote Book: Super Special Bonus Edition!

Coming soon: That’s What Dover Said – Quotes

P.S. Did anyone else notice that D: is a shocked face? Ha ha.