I didn’t get sober that week, but I kept coming back and got a sponsor, started reading the book, and I got sober that month. I continue to thoroughly work a program and I have been, cheesy as it may sound, reborn.

I am so free now. So, and I really could have stood to understand this years ago, if you have sudden indescribable and intense cravings to drink that come out of nowhere, if you cannot or do not care to moderate your drinking, and just drink to get messed up and outside of reality, keep the program in mind. Nobody could see my disease. I dressed well, had a job, and made okay grades. Nobody would have thought I had a problem.

I almost fooled myself there, for a second. Oh, and I’ve had more fun in AA than I ever had drinking. I went to a fun conference in Oregon for young people in AA over New Year’s weekend, I have friends that I finally relate to (an alcoholic brain just thinks a little differently, I guess), I can take real care of myself, and I’ve gotten my family back. I haven’t had an open and honest relationship with my family in fifteen years. I honestly feel love for them and I show them that every day.

We used to go days without seeing each other, and we lived in the same house…this program is incredible.