Another year added—and  what does this mean? Does this mean that the more years I have, the more full-grown being I’ll become? Does this mean more wisdom? More wiser, more decisive, more clever?

I’m not sure and I decided not to seek any answers to that. Let it be, let life flows itself.Raw. Undemanding. Plain.

Looking back, made me shed enough tears, and more tears were coming as I continue giving myself a rough analysis and scrutiny of what have I done to my life  for the past years. Where was I then? Where I am heading now? The immeasurable amount of tears I shed carries the symbol of how I lived life.

I realized them all, only of course realization always come in the end. 

I’ve wronged myself, no, not my life. I’ve hurt myself, and hurt other people as well. And allowed other people to hurt me as well. No, no these were not choices that I made, because there were no choices in the first place. Not even options.

Because this is how life works – because when everything in life are perfect what’s the purpose of life then?

The coming of age of a person is not a determinant of his/her being to impose  a desire, preferences as how to live , exist and survive. It is simply an indicator that you can still go on with your passage and unwrap what lies ahead. Feel free to unlock more. Stumble and soar. 

And the people who sailed along with me were not accidental casts and characters who were just bent to spread colors to my life . I believe they came in for a purpose. They wanted me to be functional, be stiff and boring.

As to the other purpose- well my story is still in progress, only that I will be in full control now.

And as I go on to experience more about life, I’d like to give credits the wonderful human beings who participated along with me in the center stage of my performance. I thanked those who made me feel special, thank you for the compassion. To those who unknowingly participated in my anguish, thank you as well, for whenever my heart bleeds it  becomes stronger and more numb to sadness.

Thank you all.

In the end, I ask forgiveness to those whom I’ve unconsciously  hurt & if somehow I became a reason of your hurting.

I have already  forgiven  those who consciously offended me.

I will now brace myself to another chapter of my story. My life. If you want to accompany me in this new quest, be my guest. I embrace you with strength. Let’s live on.

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