as a creative writing exercise try writing your own star sign predictions

HOROSCOPES FOR TODAY
1/. AQUARIUS – As a skeptic, you don’t believe in astrology, but reading this as about your disbelief you’ll be converted. Gotcha!
2/. PISCES – The Moon is in Mars, which is worrying, as it should be orbiting Earth. You’re one crazy mixed up kid.
3/. VIRGO You think this reading is very accurate about you but if you read Taurus that one is just perfect for you too – so naïve.
4/. SCORPIO the same as yesterday and the day before – nothing exciting happens to you. You’re life is very dull and mundane.
5/. LIBRA a terrible death awaits you at noon tomorrow involving alligators.. A joke of course and you’ll bore everyone telling it over and over again.
6/. SAGITARIUS You wish you were an Aries, as they seem to have a better time and a better horoscope than you.
7/. TAURUS You think you have great taste in music but no one will let you DJ for them, so take a hint.
8/. GEMINI You dream of a holiday abroad, but its Blackpool again for you this year
9/. LEO I see your horoscope says you are compatible with Aquarian men, so my phone number is.
10/. CANCER takes more chances – just go out the door without checking if it’s raining or not. Don’t take your umbrella – Similarly, don’t expect my readings to tell you what today has in store for you.
11/. ARIES you’re developing an affection for middle-aged balding astrologers – one will take you to dinner tonight at Dimitrio’s Tapas Bar. – Meet me, er him, at eight. You won’t be disappointed.
12/. CAPRICORN I really see nothing for you, good or bad. Your day exists in a vacuum, or maybe I’m just tired, – takes it out on you writing a dozen horoscopes a day. Make your own fortune. I quit.
As you may guess, I don’t believe in astrology so this writing exercise is just for fun

Arthur Chappell