I was watching a programme about orchestras tonight and just for a second, a trumpeteer’s wedding ring was framed, a band of gold in a masculine fist, and a brief flash ran through me. It was a fleeting but delicious, like catching a glimpse of something forbidden. It didn’t matter that I had no idea what he looked like, but for a moment, I wanted him.

I have often wondered about the things that turn us on. Men are well-known for being visual creatures. Women are supposedly more cerebral. Well, yes and no. We are turned on by visuals just different visuals. Context is everything I believe. Certainly the more unobtainable the more sexy. Adam was not the only one who was tempted after all.

There is a TV show on Channel 4 right now about extreme male beauty. There was a segment about what women found attractive. Ok, I accept that people keep sane by generalising, but the conclusions were that women liked buff, not- too-beautiful men. Well, who doesn’t? It doesn’t matter what your gender or sexuality is, in any roomful of people, you will inevitably be attracted to the one who is easy on the eye (but not too easy).

Most men like big breasts, big hair and big lips (I present the popularity of page 3 girls and the ubiquitous Ms Price, plus Playboy, FHM… I don’t think I need to go on). Most women, I concede, do appear to like smooth chests, super cut stomachs and butts you could bounce a pound off. Sure they like looking at them, but are they a turn on? In my experience… no.

I would agree that women generally get turned on by other sensory stimuli – voice, touch, attention… visual alone is not so easy to pin down.

For me, it’s small, quick and lasts no more than a few seconds, but powerful. I was on a down escalator once, chatting away to workmates, when I turned around and saw the open collar of a male colleague. Dark fine hair peeked out of blue cotton, against cream skin, gently vibrating with breath. It took mine away. I had to stop talking, look away, and take a few steps forward. The stab of desire was staggering. It faded after a few seconds, but it was enough to be embarrassing.

Tattoos have a similar effect on me. The sight of dark ink, coiling out from under collar or sleeve, can make me weak in the knees (and other places of course).

For other women, just a walk. A profile in thought. Sweat glinting off a bald head. A belly jiggling. A man putting on make-up. But the most heady sight of all, is always forbidden.  The rhythmic flexing of an arm, head thrown back. Wedding ring on a masculine hand. Brother’s best mate swimming. Brother drying off…

Oh yes, women are visual. Just in a very different way.