“Payout”, “bet” are the terms used in playing the slot machines or the “Jackpot”.  I always heard my husband and my younger brother talked about it.  I don’t know why but their experience excites me.  Hence, I asked my husband to bring me to one of the places so that I too can have share the feeling of winning or losing.  But knowing my husband, he was very reluctant to oblige to my wishes.  Then again, being a stubborn wife, I kept on begging till at last he agreed, thanks to my birthday that was just a few days ahead.  He said, “Ok I’ll bring you along as your birthday gift”.

            The night when I was to turn 36 years old, my husband and I went to TRC at Tawau. It was embarrassing because I was the only lady visiting the place.  Of course, the staffs are all pretty women with tight skirts.  When we came there, all machines were occupied.  We have to wait for our turn at the counter.  Finally, we got room 1 to start my living skills.  There was only one slot machine in the room and the light was quite dim. 

            My husband gave RM100 to the lady outside the room.  And the lady shouted, ” One one”.  I didn’t know what that means but I guessed it was one 100 note.  Then, my husband taught me how to bet.  After the bet was put, the dice began to roll.  Over the time, I could feel tension inside the room.  First my husband won RM40, then RM80 but he lost it all when he challenged the machine.  It was frustrating!  I started to name the machine a “bad machine”.  When we lost, another “One- one”.  So far we had lost four hundred ringgit. 

            I told my husband to quit playing but he said, “You wanted to play the Jackpot, so this is how the game is played”.  The most we got was more than two hundred credits but we lost it when we challenged the slot machine.  Though it said “good luck” in the machine, we were not feeling lucky at that time.  If I were to calculate all the money, we had lost RM500.00 in a matter of two hours only.  And if at first I was thrilled at the game, I was angry and regret then.

            I learned a lot that night.  One thing for sure, the feelings of losing your money after all the hard work.  I felt like crying.  Wouldn’t it be nice if all the money is spent on my children? Normally, when I told myself not to cry over spilled milk, I managed to calm myself.  But at that point, the magic words had lost its charms.  When you won, you feel ‘rich’ but when you lost, you feel as if you want to smash the machine!  However, why blame the poor machine?  You are the fool who should be blamed for you know it’s a gambling. 

            Hence, if you were to play the slot machines, make a point that you will only spend a certain amount.  Whether you win or not, that’s another story.  You are the master of your own mind, so be in-charge of yourself.  Don’t let your desire control you.  If you won some money, “payout”.   Remember, it is gambling.  Therefore, don’t gamble yourself away.