A tall skinny girl, with stringy hair and bottle cap glasses. I didn’t have money to buy the latest trends or the social skills needed to make friends. I was bullied.

Growing up, I was teased… a lot. I did have a small group of friends. We were not the “in crowd” 

At the start of middle school. My mother got me contact lenses and I “reinvented” myself. My first day of 7th grade, all of a sudden, new looks, got me new friends. I wasn’t really sure how I felt about people only liking me because I changed my looks, but I certainly wasn’t going to waste the opportunity to be “cool”. 

Very quickly, my new friends had influence on my personality. I started teasing, mocking and bullying other kids. Girls, guys, even teachers. 

I would do anything I needed, NEVER to be the victim again, so I made sure I couldn’t be. I turned into a monster. I wanted people to be afraid of me, so they couldn’t hurt me.

I continued these habits all through high school. If you knew me now, you would never guess that I was that type of person. I am kind, gentle and fun loving, but I did what I thought I had to do to survive high school.

For me, I think bullying was a way of making myself feel better about when it happened to me. I wanted to make sure I couldn’t be victimized anymore. I truly regret all of my actions. I think about the people I tortured all the time. I apologize every time I get the chance. So if you’re reading this and you’re the bully, or the victim, remember that it does get better, the real world is NOT like high school. Remember that hurting other people will NOT heal your own wounds, only make them deeper.